Today is the remedy for yesterday’s snoozer! And what better way to wake up than with another edition of “Secret Thoughts”?
Panel 1: Ted: “I’m pretty excited about the Playstation 3…All I have in the dumpster where I live is an old Colecovision someone threw on my head while I was sleeping. And with no power, I just sit there and imagine I’m playing Zaxxon anyway. Man, this dwarf on my shoulder smells funny. Hmmmm, has Tyler morphed from the corpse of Dean Martin to the corpse of Benicio Del Toro?”
Benicio: “I’m not dead, dude. I just look that way.”
Panel 2: Benici-Dino: “‘Taking someone to the Bucket’ continues to be an amusing nickname for some unspeakable sexual act. At least I hope it is, because that resturaunt by the same name sucks.”
Mark ‘Brick’ Jeske: “Aw man…did I just say ‘marionette’? The first line I get all year and I say something totally gay. I really should have just made a whip-cracking noise. Oh well, people still have to be my friend since I’m the only guy rich enough in this jerkwater burg to have a PS3. Being rich is pretty awesome. Wait, did I just think ‘jerkwater burg?’ Damn. Well, at least nobody heard that.”
Panel 3: Mr. Whiny Super-Curl: “Crap, ‘taking her to the bucket’ really meant taking her to the Bucket… Oh well. I better ask my bitch girlfriend what a word means that was used to insult my relationship with her. Next I’ll ask the psycho what it means when my friends make that whip cracking sound.”
The Brynna Monster: “I can hear your thoughts, you moron. You know the only reason you’re still alive is that I’ll need your chest cavity to plant my eggs into…Now hold still. This won’t hurt a bit…well, not until all your internal organs explode in two weeks. Wow, I’m pretty creepy.”
I’m rather disturbed by the curl on Tyler’s forehead–it seems to be changing direction from panel to panel. Maybe it’s not hair at all but some weird alien worm thing Brynna implanted on him.
Comment by Tim Goral — January 25, 2007 @ 11:37 am
To judge from the profile in panel 1, the worm-thing on Tyler’s forehead has spread through his scalp to the back of his neck. Next, it’ll root itself in his upper spinal column and force Tyler to do its will.
Today’s strip officially changed my mind about the point-guard competition. Tyler is such a mope (not to mention “dope,” if a word like “marionette” has him stumped), that he couldn’t possibly spark a basketball team as a point-guard should. Yeah, keep him on the bench, give him a thesaurus, and let him be happy with his six points a game in mopup time. R.J. Brennan all the way!
“Taking someone to the Bucket” certainly has promise as slang for an unspeakable sexual act. But, assuming that “bucket” means a woman’s you-know-what, wouldn’t it be Brynna taking Tyler to the bucket, rather than the other way around? And if Tyler has the initiative, the phrase should probably be “taking IT to the Bucket,” rather than “taking HER to the Bucket. (Unless Tyler is hoping to watch some girl-on-girl action. He does seem like the spectator type.)
And what kind of a doofus names a restaurant “The Bucket” anyway? Mmmmm, now there’s a name that promises culinary satisfaction. Their signature dish is the Slop Pail, a huge pile of food that’s free to anyone who can finish it off in one sitting.
Comment by johnw — January 25, 2007 @ 11:55 am
How about this:
Comment by Scott de B. — January 25, 2007 @ 12:06 pm
That didn’t work. Anyway, click on my name.
Comment by Scott de B. — January 25, 2007 @ 12:07 pm
Scott: Yumm-o, as Rachael Ray would say while she stuffs an entire Bucketburger into her capacious maw. That Bucket looks almost as appetizing as Milford’s “Bucket” — a.k.a. The International House of Linoleum.
Actually, I think “Taking it to the Bucket” is the name of Rachael’s next TV show.
Comment by johnw — January 25, 2007 @ 12:21 pm
Dear Bryanna ….Please ask me to go to “the Bucket” !!!
Comment by Newt — January 25, 2007 @ 1:26 pm
At one time, “The Bucket” was the in place where all the “neat-o Mudlarks” would meet and interact in “cool ways” about things their folks just wouldn’t understand.
Then the A & W Root Beer, with their roller skating waitresses moved in, then the IHOP, and a Stuckey’s……. Pretty soon The Bucket raised the price on their malted shakes and downward spiral ensued.
Now it’s only a breeding zone where creatures like Brynna can thrust their ova-positors through the thorax of their unsuspecting almost Marionette like prey.
The unfortunate thing is in order for their pods to prosper the “host” must be active. With Deno’s demotion to the pine, Brynna, like any good alien breeding stock has become concerned. Shedding new light on her “Or Else” threat.
Comment by tom — January 25, 2007 @ 2:00 pm
Spoken like a true “Trekkie” Tom …..live long ( cause even if you don’t it will feel like it if we are your Peeps ) and prosper ….
Comment by Newt — January 25, 2007 @ 2:08 pm
Fashion Nuggets:
We should pitch in and buy Ted Pearce a new shirt.
Jeske’s wearing a vintage Mike Ditka-style sweater vest, except it’s a factory second that didn’t actually get BEARS sewn on.
Other items on the menu at The Bucket
Tub of Lard Hunks
Flagon of Meat Bits
Kettle of Fish Parts
Vat of Fried Ends
Pot of Brined Skin
Pitcher of Pickled Stuff
Yumm-O!
Comment by Ned Ryerson — January 25, 2007 @ 2:35 pm
Bucket makes me think of Monty Python’s “Meaning of Life” skit with the obese man who in response to the head waiter’s inquiry as to how he is feeling says, “Better…better bring a bucket, I think I’m gonna puke.”
Comment by johnwhorfin — January 25, 2007 @ 2:36 pm
Maybe it’s like that British sitcom “Keeping Up Appearances,” with the middle-class woman who desperately aspires to upper-crust status. Her name is Hyacinth Bucket, but she insists it’s pronounced “bouquet.”
Hey, maybe that could be the summer plotline: some hot young chef buys the Bucket, starts pronouncing it “Bouquet,” and replaces the greasy goodies with a menu full of Nouvelle Cuisine. Consternation among Milford’s teens! Protest marches! Boycotts! (As Tyler might say, “I have two words for you: Boy Cott!”) At the end of the summer, the chef learns to respect good old small-town values, and brings back the deep fryer. All is well.
Comment by johnw — January 25, 2007 @ 3:59 pm
If you had to name your fine dining establishment “The Bucket”, it would work much better in an isolated college town rather than the thriving metropolis of Meltdown.
Comment by dale — January 25, 2007 @ 4:50 pm
I think going out with your girlfriend is a better choice then
playing some video game you can play anytime. But what high school
level student doesn’t know what a marionette is?
Comment by Rob — January 25, 2007 @ 7:08 pm
Ted forgot to mention that Jeske only bought one controller so all they were going to do was go watch him play with himself (bah-dump-dump-cha – i’ll be here all week folks, try the veal).
Comment by bart — January 26, 2007 @ 12:01 pm
Gee… watching somebody else play PSP… go to the Bucket… I’ll have to flip a coin. What a rich pageant of life they enjoy in Milford!
Comment by johnw — January 26, 2007 @ 1:15 pm
[...] stories is by far the most interesting thing in the whole town. Apparently Mark Jeske’s PS3 is [...]
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