Juan Valdez works for my dad

“So, Elmer, you’re gonna continue this story yet another day, eh?”
“Yup! I figure if I’m gonna bore you with details, it might as well be all week.”
“It’s gone on so long, my wacky hair ball has doubled in size! And your mullet has gotten so long and flowing…Sexy!”
“Hold that thought. We’re headed to another flashback! In this one, we see how my dad’s massive hands and tiny blank clipboard got him far in the world of brick magic. After Old Man Dolan kicked it, there was nobody in charge, so Dad started showing up to work in a tie, yelling and pointing a lot, so folks figured he must be the asshole in charge. Eventually with his slick hair and groomed moustache, he was promoted to ‘Evil county commissioner villain in Mark Trail‘ but soon realized that he’d rather return to Gil Thorp than get punched in the face by Mark Trail’s fists o’ justice…so here we are.”
“Yawn.”
“Also, he installed a ceiling camera in our living room so he could monitor my mother and sisters at all times.”
“Fabulous. But will I get to hear more tomorrow?”
“Presuming Gil is still passed out drunk…yes.”







I really enjoy the blank clipboard. Nothing says “I’m a fraud who’s trying to look important” quite like a clipboard with nothing on it. I’m disappointed, though, that Armando’s resemblance to Brak’s dad is fading. I was hoping Elmer would enter a rap contest and Armando would show up at the last second to help him win it.
Comment by Cash — May 1, 2008 @ 8:49 am
That clipboard is strictly for show. It’s only about six inches high — either that, or Armando has the biggest thumb in the world.
This storyline is following the classic Neal Rubin pattern so far: first, drag out the initial exposition until everyone is sick of it. The next phase: switch to a new storyline until everyone has forgotten about this one. Finally, bring it back and resolve it in an ultra-speedy and nonsensical manner.
The art may change, but the plotting remains the same.
Comment by johnw — May 1, 2008 @ 9:18 am
Somewhere in Milford there must be a company that manufactures tiny clipboards, since Gil was using one in an earlier strip.
Comment by Scott de B. — May 1, 2008 @ 9:32 am
Now I need to know what’s in the window they’re strolling past in Panel 1. Is it lingerie? puppies? puppies in lingerie? Clue us in Whiggie.
Nice poured concrete sofa! This guy is a magician!
Who’s on Sr. Vargas’ crew? My guess is Thurman Munson and Dan Cortese.
That’s the standard Gil Thorp clipboard. You can buy them at NOMAR’S.
Comment by Ned Ryerson — May 1, 2008 @ 9:35 am
So Senor Vargas’ work crew consists of a pirate and an old-timey baseball player?
Comment by sourbelly — May 1, 2008 @ 10:20 am
Mr. Vargas is all thumbs!
Comment by sir douglas — May 1, 2008 @ 10:21 am
Quality humor today. I’m amazed, given the agony of more useless plot points. Panel2, it seems Vargas has dipped his hand in the concrete. I also like the vaugely confused annoyance on the part of the workers in the background. “What does that guy want?” “..Dunno, but he’s got a clipboard so he must be da boss.”
Comment by Emily — May 1, 2008 @ 10:35 am
The girl (who the hell remembers her name?) looks like Roseann Roseanna Danna from 70’s SNL.
Comment by Gil'sBarber — May 1, 2008 @ 11:30 am
I’m just busy wondering why the two guys are dressed as ballplayers in order to stack bricks. I also like how Elmer gains two sisters, as they were never mentioned previously…but that’s the Rubin method…make it up as ya go along.
Branden Oyl is getting uglier with each passing (slow moving) panel.
Comment by Regina — May 1, 2008 @ 12:01 pm
Also, what’s with the tiny guy growing out of Branden Oyl’s shoulder?
Comment by Regina — May 1, 2008 @ 12:03 pm
Truly Mr. Vargas is a mason magician. His family seems awfully comfortable on that sofa, even though it’s obviously made out of concrete slabs.
Comment by El Santo — May 1, 2008 @ 1:00 pm
In panel two, why is he shouting at the two men for playing baseball? I thought it was baseball season. We met the team and saw them lose (?) a couple of games. Is that it?
This is a summer plot. C’mon. I want to see Elmer the Fantastico hit .500.
Comment by bevo — May 1, 2008 @ 2:15 pm
The way my brain is interpreting the second panel, if those are standard bricks, then his brick layers are some seriously lilliputian men — not even half the size of your average dwarf.
This may explain the presence of a tiny clipboard too. Also: it’s very hard for a man to hide when he’s surrounded by tiny, little fairy-men all the time.
Comment by Striker — May 1, 2008 @ 3:06 pm
Finally we get to see some of the “magic” of the famous Brick Magician! His hand magically turns into a unicorn right in front of your eyes! Zzzzzap!
Comment by Laura Jane — May 1, 2008 @ 3:23 pm
Sr. Dolan’s clipboard obviously holds a drawing of the brick wall he and his expert crew of suspiciously foriegn-looking workers are building. It’s not a big wall, so why would he need a big clipboard?
Comment by Cubsguy — May 1, 2008 @ 4:02 pm
At the outset, I assumed the masonry business manufactured bricks. Why else would it need to fly in a foreign expert and his family?
Now it seems that it is part of that elite society which puts things on top of other things.
Comment by dale — May 1, 2008 @ 4:24 pm
I like the tiny fairy men explanation, since that is one crappy wall they are building. The town is filled with giant looming architecture, yet they are stacking sun-dried chunks of clay.
For the love of god, let’s get back to baseball and why Curlyhorse has suddenly become a dick again.
Comment by julienne — May 1, 2008 @ 4:34 pm
Julienne, I would capitalize God if I were you. No more baseball till Monday. And another way people look important even if they’re not is to have a bunch of keys on their waist. You really think they use all those jangling keys? All for show.
Comment by RobM — May 1, 2008 @ 7:04 pm
Well let’s face it. If you’re an illegal alien and don’t know it, you just have to wear a chitty tie and a dollar-store jacket and a tiny clipboard that they sell at the STORE.
BUT you are Rotary Club Man of the year! Quite the exclusive club!
If any homeless peep are out by our dumpsters, sign em up (we got some extra chitty ties) !
Comment by Gil'sBarber — May 1, 2008 @ 7:15 pm
And btw - how long have Coach Thorp and Kaz been sleeping it off? Sheesh, sober up already!
Comment by Gil'sBarber — May 1, 2008 @ 7:20 pm
FRI. 05/02/08 strip -
Panel one - “What’s Spanish for ‘ugly grotesque hands? ‘ ”
Panel three - ” You mean my idiot best friend is telling people how to balance a snowball on the visor of their ballcap ?”
Comment by ecp — May 1, 2008 @ 8:43 pm