“Hey Ma. Thanks for getting here so quickly! This place is scary…they say the ghost of Bing Crosby shuffles through the halls, pretending to be a doctor!”
“Well, it was a pretty long trip, or maybe it wasn’t? We had that loser Coach Shaw drive us all the way from Milford. He had nothing better to do, and it really wasn’t very far from here…Or wait, was it?”
“Oh and thanks for covering up the high beams you normally have goin’ on at home.”
“Well the jacket’s just for this cold room…how do you think I got us all in here past visiting hours…and got the guard, (who I presume exists, since somebody is supposed to be, you know, WATCHING A PRISONER when he’s not in JAIL??) to go home early?”
“That was quite the parenthetical aside, ma.”
“So Campo said somethin’ about my face taunting me, reminding him of ’1970s Bush’. Then he whipped out that pointy thing from his pants and pricked me repeatedly. What a dick!”
Prison Rape Jokes: The staple of any good blog entry!