3/23/11
Mysteries of the Moment:
- Who the hell is Kayla talking to?
- Will Lini get to his ventriloquism gig in the Catskills in time?
- Will Whigham ever draw Marty Moon again? (On the plus side, today’s rehash is from one of my recent favorite strips, featuring Stretch Armstong attack!)
3/24/11
Mystery of the Moment: Why will Milford never make the playdowns in any sport ever again?
- Gil is too drunk to care.
- Ever since Gil acquired Clambake’s “Baseball Participant” trophy (which appears to be slowly shrinking), he has more than enough shiny metal objects on his desk for one decade.
- Rubin will never learn to pace a story properly, thus making playdown plots impossible. (“Well kids, we won all our games this year! Unfortunately the championship game happened two months ago…The district just didn’t have the heart to tell us.”)
- All of the above.
3/25/11
I will ignore the fact that Lini has gone to Gil for advice. The entire episode is unrealistic enough…I mean, how does Gil even know the phrase “cyber-bully”? At least there’s some realism here: Gil nods off in mid-advice again.
Since there’s nothing more interesting to talk about, the mystery of the moment for your discussion:
- Which 1980s character has Lini stolen his wardrobe from? I’m going to guess Joey Lawrence.
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“Let’s use that as a launching pad for next year!” Wow, coaching is like rocket science. Just ask Steve Luhm.
Is the spring script here? Can we get on with the official naming of the baseball and softball rosters?
Comment by Dood — March 25, 2011 @ 8:38 am
Lini’s 3/25 wardrobe, courtesy of “Annie Hall.” But maybe not the pleated skirt.
Comment by Cody X. Ner — March 25, 2011 @ 9:14 am
Wh… bu…guh… so, that’s IT?????
Even by Rubin’s standards, this is a thoroughly hamfisted ending. Wow, the team’s playing better; too bad the SEASON’S OVER. With no warning at all. And Gil is basking in the glow of his own incompetence: How about that, he had a good team all along, but they didn’t start playing well until Cortez elbowed Parker in the face during a practice where, apparently, no coaches were in attendance. Yep, intra-team violence is the answer all right. Learn that lesson well, young readers!
Gil doesn’t even care when Lini gives him a verbal bitchslap. “Dress better,” indeed. That’s rich, coming from someone wearing a size 52 vest, a zebra-skin tie, and MC Hammer pants.
And, of course, Whigham contributes to the mess with yet another recycled panel.
If I thought Rubin was capable of planning on this level, I’d accuse him of deliberately suckifying this story just to spite us snarky commenters at TWIM. “Oh, so you think the strip sucks?” Rubin snarls. “You think my plotting is erratic and nonsensical? Well, just wait till you get a load of THIS!”
And once again, Neal Rubin misses the Eisner Award playdowns.
Comment by John S. Walters — March 25, 2011 @ 9:32 am
3. John S. –>Gil is also basking in the glow of his own incontinence.
Sacko & Hatt were one-season protagonists and we expected to see more of them because they took over Marty Moon’s show. So I don’t expect we’ll ever hear from Linguini again.
Comment by semperfi4evr — March 25, 2011 @ 10:11 am
“You’d dress better!” Hey, don’t be knocking Gil’s sweet-ass vintage Mark Trail shirt. He’s got some hunting and fishing to do this baseball season.
Comment by Dood — March 25, 2011 @ 10:48 am
4. semperfi: Sacko and Hatt had to leave. Their home planet needed them.
Comment by sourbelly — March 25, 2011 @ 10:51 am
Did Sacko and Hatt get Thorp-kidded?
Comment by Dood — March 25, 2011 @ 10:55 am
Lini is a member of a Doctor Who Fanclub , hence the wardrobe.
Comment by exmiscellanea — March 25, 2011 @ 11:04 am
Well, we haven’t seen Sacko and the Hatt — but neither have we seen Marty Moon return to the brighty-lit set of “Prep Spotlight.” My guess is that the station canceled the show to make room for that self-cleaning litterbox infomercial.
Sacko and Hatt, most likely, are plying their wares in an Introduction to Broadcasting course at their local community college. “Boom goes the dynamite!”
Comment by John S. Walters — March 25, 2011 @ 12:20 pm
“Well, Lini, we at Milford High take bullying in all forms pretty seriously. Which is why I strenuously suggest you forget it ever happened, because not only would it lead to a lot of paperwork for me, but also a lot of unfortunate questions about why I had no idea my basketball players were bullying each other and what I did to stop it, which to be honest I’m still a little in the dark about. So the important thing to remember is that people wore green to our games because they like you so much, because nothing bad ever happens to people who have friends. See you in baseball season.”
Comment by Drew Funk — March 25, 2011 @ 12:28 pm
No. 10, Drew: Bravo, sir.
No. 9, John: What about hronk goes the dynamite?
Comment by Dood — March 25, 2011 @ 12:46 pm
“Five *straight* wins”? What, didn’t Lini help?
Comment by Harder than a spanking — March 25, 2011 @ 1:27 pm
Don’t know about the future, that’s anybody’s guess.
Ain’t no good reason for getting all depressed.
Buy up your pad and pencil, I’ll give you a piece of my mind,
In my opinionation, the sun is gonna surely shine.
Stop all your fussin’,
Slap on a smile
Come out and walk in the sun for awhile.
Don’t fight the felling, you know you want to have a good time.
And in my opinionation, the sun is gonna surely shine.
Comment by LogopolisMike — March 25, 2011 @ 1:53 pm
Ever hear a high school coach say what Thorp said in P2 of 3/24? Next year your seniors(who should be your best players) will be gone. And believe me, if Rubin remembers 1 player from this team next season, I’ll be floored. It’ll be a whole new cast of neir-do-wells rescued by a walk-on after the horse has left the barn. Maybe they’ll decide Steve Luhm hasnt officially graduated yet and put him back in.
And what happened to the girls team?? It dissappeared in January, never to be heard from again. (Just guessing on the month)
And how about the arms raised in salute of 3rd place? Yes!! Lame.
Comment by Rob — March 25, 2011 @ 2:13 pm
Dood — I think it’s “Boom goes the dynamite” and “Hronk goes the Nut-boy.”
Comment by John S. Walters — March 25, 2011 @ 2:35 pm
Nut Boys?! They’re shitty! Check it! Count it! Bonk! HRONK!
Comment by Don, the Rebel without a Blog — March 25, 2011 @ 6:39 pm
The green wave crowd doesn’t like Lini. It’s crowd/mob psychology and a few guys hoping a fight will break out (not involving them).
Comment by dale — March 25, 2011 @ 7:02 pm
i thought sacko and hatt were the guys who liked to watch amateur golf? my plot prediction for baseball is the singer/pitcher has knocked up cassie and cant play baseball . gil will tell the kid it was probably a member of back yard tire fire whos the real dad plus he knows a great abortion doctor down in charleston by the name of baskt.
Comment by mr120zcan — March 26, 2011 @ 9:18 am
120z, my sources tell me that Nostradamus predicted the exact same thing.
Comment by vaganova — March 26, 2011 @ 3:53 pm
I agree with Linguini here about Gil…he’s wearing the latest in the “Mark Trail Collection”.
“Lini! What can I do for you? Never mind what I can do for you, can you Irish up the coffee in my “Gil” mug for me? The booze is in that supposed baseball trophy. Thanks!”
I say Leni Riefenstahl’s wardrobe is circa Alex Keaton from Family Ties.
Comment by Regina — March 26, 2011 @ 5:12 pm
Regina, your bringing up the wonderful horrible Leni Riefenstahl permanently qualifies you as THE absolute hottest…
Comment by vaganova — March 26, 2011 @ 7:38 pm
Awwww, thanks vaganova.
Comment by Regina — March 27, 2011 @ 6:21 am