10/20/11
10/21/11
Two more days worth of strip to illustrate Milford’s kicking problem. Don’t take that THUD! personally, Derek Tolan. There’s no footing to be found on the field (and all the players inexplicably wore their Florsheims instead of cleats) and Miles Paris is demonstrating that he doesn’t know how to hold for a placekick.
10/22/11
“Derek wants to work late on his kicking. But first he’s going to work on some dance moves. I think he’s doing that “We’re the boys in the chorus” routine from the Bugs Bunny short, What’s Up Doc? Say, nice crotch-huggers, Gil.”
“You too, Bob. Keep the boys high and tight, I always say. I’m gonna go work on Brody Abro”
“Is that code?”
Later…
“Hello, Mrs. Abro”
“Please, call me Marcie, Coach Thorp sir.”
“No need for formalities. Just call me Coach Thorp.”
“Sorry, old habit, sir, er, Coach Thorp. Would you like to come in for some coffee?”
“Yeah coffee sounds okay. I’d like to talk to you about putting your son Brody, who has been diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome, on the football team. I’ve discussed his Asperger’s with the school’s guidance counselor and we both feel that participation in team sports would be a benefit to him, what with the Asperger’s and all.”
“That sounds wonderful, Coach Thorp. What do you take in your coffee, Coach Thorp?”
“Oh, um, got any Sambuca?”
“I don’t think so, is that an artificial sweetener?”
“Never mind. Look, I don’t know much about this Asberger’s stuff, other than what the guidance counselor read to me from Brody’s personal protected health information file over coffee, so I figured you might share whatever tricks you use to get Brody to do stuff, ’cause frankly, I don’t even know where to start. I have a hard enough time dealing with normal kids.”
“Yeah, well, um, you might want to start by thinking of him as a normal kid. Surely you must have to build relationships with all kinds of kids. You’ve been coaching them for fifty years.”
“What’s that?”
“You know, leading by example, building trust, developing character…isn’t that what you call ‘coaching’?”
“Come again?”
“Is there somebody else at the school I should talk to about this?”
“Oh, I think we’ll figure it out. This plain coffee kinda makes me jumpy, so I’ve gotta run. Why don’t you drop Brody off at practice tomorrow and we’ll see if I can ‘coach him up’ for ya?”
Okay, now wait… they go for a 2-point conversion because they have “no kicker.” And later, they try for a field goal (from an unknown distance) using a completely untested kicker in a DRIVING RAINSTORM? The odds are much better if you just go for it on fourth and four.
Yep, Gil’s definitely trying to lose these games.
Comment by jvwalt — October 22, 2011 @ 11:16 am
10/22 P1: Kaz is wearing his lucky “Hello Kitty” pants to practice! He’s hoping to get lucky with Gill again. Gee, you can only imagine what Gil is doing with his hands. Code indeed.
Comment by semperfi4evr — October 22, 2011 @ 11:27 am
Well – I dont know whats a bigger mess, the kicking situation or the weather situation. This is the OPENING home game. The home opener for the team I watch (in August) we were wearing shorts. Whats gonna happen when the weather REALLY gets bad?
And our season ended last night, or this afternoon. Guess we have Christmas Eve football in store this year. How will they kick on a frozen field? You think its bad now……
Comical P3 on 10/21 – the defender sees the ball bounce off his shoulder pads..does he know he’s supposed to RAISE HIS ARMS and attempt to block the kick?? Like everyone else?? Guess he knows the kicker sucks so bad he doesnt need to, but now we know Gil isnt the only poor coach out there. Can anybody here play this game?
Comment by Rob — October 22, 2011 @ 4:23 pm
Just read the long blog post and ‘got any Sambuca’ rang a bell.
Sam Bucca’s is a small bar in Palos that just started karaoke on Wednesday nights – I was just there 2 weeks ago. Small world.
Comment by Rob — October 22, 2011 @ 5:19 pm
Check it out! The part of Brody’s mom is now being played by Cub Koda. Everybody knows that smokin’ ain’t allowed in school!
Comment by jules — October 22, 2011 @ 5:51 pm
I’m thinking Gil got his idea fro the Miami Dolphin fans and the “Suck for Luck” they’ve got going, but high school football teams can’t draft Andrew Luck.
Comment by Soccerhead — October 22, 2011 @ 6:30 pm
oh my god jules has a brownsvillle station 45 ,gil is impressed with momma brodys giraaffee neck and that she boils her kaluha mimi never thought of that . foozle me once cant foozle me twice
Comment by mr12ozcan — October 22, 2011 @ 6:39 pm
Now I’m not complaining about this, but with rainstorms, quitting kickers, and Cub Koda, we have not seen or heard of that “Wildcat” jerk in some time. Anybody have any idea how he fits into this AS kicker story, or am I the only one stupid enough to think of such things? There’s probably a connection, but I’m not seein’ it, unless it’s that “Wildcat” is to further make an ass of himself by ridiculing the Asperger kid, who then puts Milford into the playoffs (sorry, DOWNS) with a key field goal. This would at least be consistent with the ongoing story of angry, insecure white men (Ray of the Jungle, Peake the Cheat, and the dork Molly Kinsella tangled with this past summer) getting shown up.
Comment by vaganova — October 22, 2011 @ 6:59 pm
Vaganova — I like a lot of your analysis, but ain’t no way Milford’s making the playdowns. They’ll go on an Afterschool Special late-season winning streak thanks to Brody Abro, but they’ll still miss the postseason. Then Wildcat will go before the school board and demand Gil’s ouster. Gil will then shake off the booze just long enough to give an impassioned speech about sportsmanship, blah blah blah, and Wildcat will slink off into the shadows just like Hobart.
Comment by jvwalt — October 22, 2011 @ 8:57 pm
jvwalt, I think you’re right– you usually are. Playdowns would be a stretch– not having a kicker is only one of this team’s many lacks. I was thinking of a winning streak owing to the unlikely kicker (this season’s version of the illegal infielder, the end with the heart condition, the boy who is officially homeless, the girl who gets stigmatized because somebody posts a cardboard bikini picture, etc) but an inspiring finish to the season is a lot more likely than playdowns. Afterschool Special indeed.
But I do think that Wildcat’s inevitable squashing will have something to do with dissing the Aspie kicker, who is pretty clearly lined up to be the unfairly targeted kid. But first Whigrub will have to figure out a realistic way for him to function in a setting which is wrong for an Aspie in virtually every way.
Comment by vaganova — October 22, 2011 @ 9:14 pm
“Check it out! The part of Brody’s mom is now being played by Cub Koda”
I’m thinking Edna Mode from The Incredibles.
Comment by Scott de B. — October 22, 2011 @ 10:53 pm
Trust building step 1: Don’t let Brody find out that Gil has been visiting his mother.
Does Brody have a father around? His mother made a point of showing her ring, but that could just be Whigham’s (sp?) obsession with drawing hands in all the wrong places.
Comment by dale — October 23, 2011 @ 2:50 am
1. Panel three, 10/21: Not only is the kick blocked, but it is blocked as ball is descending! Milford really needs a kicker whose range extends beyond the line of scrimmage.
2. Vaganova: Playdowns? You’re talking about playdowns? We’re just trying to win a game here. Don’t ask me about playdowns! Playdowns?
Richard
Comment by richard sansing — October 23, 2011 @ 2:59 am
“I’m thinking Edna Mode from The Incredibles.”
I’ll go along with that, but she has to say my favorite line to Gil: “My God, you’ve gotten fat.”
Comment by jules — October 23, 2011 @ 9:19 am
Playing Brody Abro’s mother: a pencil-neck geek.
Comment by Doug Puthoff — October 23, 2011 @ 9:29 pm
I’m figuring by next May this stinkpile of a plot should be wrapped up.
So, has former kicker Azal Jaddou officially been Cody Exnered? Kid-in-Treed? Mr. Baskted? Lanny Penned? Argo Impenaryed?
Where in the wide, wide world of Wally Lamb is Marjie Ducey? Has she hung up her beret and reporter’s notebook?
Comment by Dood — October 24, 2011 @ 5:49 am
Rob @3: I think Tilden player #69 is surprised that the kick was so poor as to hit him in the shoulder pads, hence no reaction to lift his arms.
dale @12: Brody’s mom is flashing the ring to keep Gil at bay.
Richard @13: Is Gil’s last name now Mora?
Add me to the list of those trying to figure out how Wildcat and Deke Davey (remember him?) are getting woven back into this arc. I can buy vaganova’s assertion that Wildcat will dis Brody and exit stage right, even. Deke will be found guilty by association.
Comment by delvaldawg — October 24, 2011 @ 7:13 am
Good point about Deke. What was the purpose of bringing him into this story line and then just forget about him. At some point I would expect him to join in the palace coup with Wildcat to overthrow Gil and Kaz and take Milford to the playdowns or perhaps wrangle a scholarship for his son.
Comment by Bobby Joe — October 24, 2011 @ 10:29 am
Deke Davey will probably have some understanding of Aperger’s so that he’ll be able to connect with Supertoe Abro. No matter, this storyline will still conclude in a wholly unsatisfactory and illogical fashion. Why should we expect anything different?
Are Jeff Karoub and Al-Jo Ames still an item?
Comment by Dood — October 24, 2011 @ 11:05 am
Well done and four “hronks” and a “count it” to you, semperfi4evr. Hello Kitty, indeed.
Comment by Dood — October 24, 2011 @ 11:11 am
Just came across this on Yahoo Sports, seems pertinent to the arc: http://rivals.yahoo.com/highschool/blog/prep_rally/post/Rare-free-kick-leads-to-huge-last-minute-win-in?urn=highschool-wp7579
If a free kick can be accomplished without the opponents lining up and rushing the kick, this may give Brody the opportunity to attempt his first field goal under a little less pressure.
Comment by delvaldawg — October 24, 2011 @ 1:42 pm