1/11/12
Fancy that, something slightly nonsensically interesting is finally happening around here! So Inky Kitten, or whatever her name might be, whose sole purpose appears to be for Handsome Ransom to have someone to explain his swell business plans to, questions his swell business plan of giving away crappy old VHS tapes. But lo, the teens of Milford crave his wares, as the only previous location for slightly illicit activities was that bodega next to the Bucket…you know, “Tattoos, Piercings, Bootlegs, & Hello Kitty City!” which burned down, along with half the town in 2010.
So now fat dorks in Batman t-shirts who don’t really have girlfriends, but still bafflingly find Kristen Stewart attractive in a gross, sweaty way, finally have a non-streaming method of acquiring their favorite pirated movies! Next customer: this guy.
Maybe Handsome Ransom is smarter than we thought. He’s moved to the only city in America where this store could possibly be successful. (Which is great but for the eventual beatings he’ll receive by the local holier-than-thou coaches.)
I’m really stunned at this particular strip. Titanic? Why did they choose a movie from the 1990s? The Twilight movie I get…but again – I’m still hung up on Titanic here.
Yeah – When do the beatings begin?
Comment by Sethpants — January 11, 2012 @ 9:25 pm
Do residence of Milford not know about BitTorrent? Have the Time Warner cops cut off the internet to Milford residences?
Comment by bevo — January 11, 2012 @ 10:16 pm
I’m cheering for Ransom Hale and his Dr. Girlfriend to succeed in these zany businesses without really trying.
Comment by Dood — January 12, 2012 @ 8:15 am
So now we’ve moved on past the tattoos, despite Gil’s initial revulsion, and we’re going to get a pro-SOPA storyline? Gosh, what a wheeze.
I do have to admire the bosomy close-up in panel 1. I’d think if Ransom was really smart, he’d handle the girls and give the sweaty virgin boys to Kitten.
BTW, is Kitten supposed to be an homage to Pauley Perrette?
Comment by jvwalt — January 12, 2012 @ 8:55 am
Nice Venture Bros. reference, Dood.
jvwalt: I thought Kitten was an homage to Kat Von D, despite the Punisher sleeve.
Comment by delvaldawg — January 12, 2012 @ 9:02 am
I can’t quite explain it, but … I’m finding this storyline fairly entertaining. Ransom & Kitten are the best thing that’s happened in Milford since Tyler Jay whacked himself on the back of the head with a big stick a few years ago!
Comment by jules — January 12, 2012 @ 9:50 am
Next: Handsome Ransom will start selling counterfeit Nut Boys made in China! They’re shitty! Check it! Count it! Bonk! HRONK! FOOZLE!
Comment by Don, the Rebel without a Blog — January 12, 2012 @ 10:31 am
Don — counterfeit Nut-Boys made in China and tainted with Melamine! Now, there’s a timely plot twist.
Comment by jvwalt — January 12, 2012 @ 10:43 am
P3: Ransom: “Looking for a tattoo, Mate?” Porky Puke: “Um, my girlfriend wants the new ‘Twilight’ movie… and ummm… urrrrr… I’m looking for some videos of hot guy-on-guy action I can watch with Lini.
Comment by semperfi4evr — January 12, 2012 @ 12:44 pm
OMG, what next is he selling fake Coach bags underneath the counter? Loose cigarettes (or as Outback Jack would say “fags”) for a buck a piece? This guy is not only a total douche, but he’s messing with the Feds. Hasn’t he ever read the FBI warning on the beginning of the films? (I guess not, but then, neither have I.)
I think that fat, goofy kid is Rick Bozo, the same fat goofy kid that Clambake told to lock his eyes on the hole, get set and keep swinging. Obviously, he’s as stupid as he is fat, because he’s still in HS after five years.
Comment by Regina — January 12, 2012 @ 1:07 pm
Let’s not get attached to these two self-actualized people, because, faster than you can say Dylan Bauza, they’ll be dispatched to Charleston, where all suspect characters (fake professional baseball players, degenerate gamblers, anonymous criminals, jaywalkers, mattress-tag removers and the like) are consigned.
Comment by Dood — January 12, 2012 @ 3:17 pm
hey why is it always a minority selling bootleg dvds wait to micah hungs parents find out ransom is moving in on there business.
Comment by mr12ozcan — January 12, 2012 @ 3:32 pm
Everytime we see Kitten she hs new tats on her arms. I’m convinced she’s wearing one of those bogus tattoo sleeve shirts, which I’m sure “being held for” Ransom is selling along with his bootleg DVDs.
Comment by Regina — January 13, 2012 @ 5:39 am
“You gave her ‘Titanic’?”
“Yeah, and then she all but forced me to go to the Bucket!”
bow-chicka-wow-wow
Comment by jules — January 13, 2012 @ 8:34 am
Hah! The return of Brent Raptor. By girlfriend he means his crazy bitch mom.
Comment by MovingtoMilford — January 13, 2012 @ 10:44 pm