This Week in Milford

December 25, 2013

I think I know Why. It’s Funny. No, It’s Not. Annnnd Happy Holidays (updated!)

December 23, 2013
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Folks sure do seem to get pretty excited in the Milford lockerrooms after practice. I think I know why: because that’s where the vast majority of the ‘action’ has taken place in this plot so far.

December 24, 2013
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Thanks to Mia for letting us know that Wendy may or may not have actually been wisely spending five hours a day practicing dancing.

I don’t spend a lot of time on Facebook, but is it even remotely plausible that sending a friend request to someone after seeing a video of her dancing is a ‘good’ way to hit on somebody? (Wouldn’t she have had to post it? OK, I admit that I don’t actually know how Facebook works as I’m too cool to have an account.)

In any case, you have to admit: It’s funny.

Ooooh. OK, the objection from Winnie the Creep is duly noted. Fine: No, it’s not.

Anyway, I’m sorry, tough guy, but someday, somewhere someone is going to rub naughty bits together with your sister. It may not be today, it may not be tomorrow but while you’re obsessing about that hopefully it’ll keep your mind off of thinking about whatever else they’ve been doing while watching that video.

December 25, 2013
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And, here’s our big finish! Happy Holidays from everyone in Milford. Mr. Bakst said you can all go to hell. You don’t even want to know what Elmer Vargas said when we reached out to him while he was shagging balls in the outfield for the Venados de Mazatlan in the Mexican Pacific League.

Also, during this holiday season, please consider making a large, possibly tax deductible donation to the Missing Thorp Kids Rescue Fund. It may have been years since they were last seen, but we need to make sure that they are not forgotten (as well as cover the curiously large salaries of the Fund’s executives – those holiday galas and staff BMW’s don’t pay for themselves!)

Update!

We have new word back from Elmer! There was a bit of delay as we had to translate his comments from English into Spanish and then back in to English again. After gently reminding him that it was Christmas, he replied:

Elmer speaks

I’m sure our friends with photo editing programs (and/or skills) could probably get this even better…

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9 Comments »

  1. Gil and Mimi even have Kaz and Kelly building a snowman for them while they do other things! Those two haven’t actually worked at coaching in years – since about the same time their kids disappeared.

    Comment by Milfordian — December 25, 2013 @ 10:18 pm

  2. Aren’t we kind of secretly relieved the kids HAVE disappeared? I mean it lets us go on in the eternal present in which Gil and Mimi (“Miss Clover”) are both 35, and have been for more than fifty years.) I remember the old Kerry Drake police strip, a less illogical counterpart to Dick Tracy. The official jumping of the shark came when Kerry and his wife appeared on “The Connie Jarson Show” with their newborn triplets. The end appeared near, and was. Not certain when Kerry Drake went down the drain, but am thinking probably 1970. Anybody else at TWIM old enough to remember?

    Comment by vaganova — December 26, 2013 @ 5:43 pm

  3. 2 vaganova: Sigh, old enough but don’t remember Kerry Drake. Perhaps too sophisticated for my local yokel news rag. I do remember Fonzie jumping the shark, though. Gildo looks mighty good for an octogenarian.

    Comment by semperfi4evr — December 26, 2013 @ 5:55 pm

  4. Semper Fi, your local paper probably had better taste than to run “Kerry Drake.” Ours ran that and worse. “35” sticks in my mind because on the occasion of Gil and Mimi’s wedding (what, 1985?) our local paper ran a cartoon picture of Mimi Clover and remarked that “Mr Thorp, despite teaching in Milford since 1959, is still 35…”

    Comment by vaganova — December 27, 2013 @ 7:41 am

  5. vaganova Ok, you win. Your paper is more yokel. A story about a cartoon? Yep that’s tank town fer sure.

    Comment by semperfi4evr — December 27, 2013 @ 8:09 am

  6. Yokel paper? Are you calling Sports Illustrated a yokel magazine:
    BIG NEWS FROM MILFORD: COACH THORP WEDS

    Comment by nedryerson — December 27, 2013 @ 8:28 am

  7. 6. Sir Ned : Et Tu, Sports Illustrated? It grieves me to say ummm well… yeah!

    Comment by semperfi4evr — December 27, 2013 @ 10:50 am

  8. May the record show that my saying Gil and Mimi married in “1985” was a pure guess on my part, based on the recollection of where I was living at the time. But thanks Ned– it’s right there in SI.

    Comment by vaganova — December 27, 2013 @ 1:19 pm

  9. […] may have made one or two jokes about Mia’s strong interest in watching Wendy Wiley’s wardrobe whackiness. […]

    Pingback by Mia Swoops In | This Week in Milford — June 10, 2014 @ 5:21 am


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