Also OK: The finest Plurbing shop in town.

11/5/11

First, I guess it’s pretty cutting edge to use the word ‘tard in a newspaper comic. Perhaps Rubin told his 85-year-old comics editor it was short for leotard.
Second, way to stand up for yourself, little buddy.
Third, oh great Derek’s on your side. Gosh, I sure hope Derek thinks you’re OK. His opinion really matters to me.

11/7/11

“I know this kid just stood up for himself, but that part doesn’t matter. His self-esteem and budding social skills are way less important than my opinion as a popular yet injured kid. And whatever I say is OK goes. So, Brody is OK, OK?”

Later:
“Do you think Brody is OK, jerk kid, (son of jerk dad)?”
“Sure. the cool kid said he’s OK, so, OK, he’s OK. But you know what’s not OK? You invading my personal space, weird blond sidekick kid. OK?”
“OK.”

11/8/11

Hey great, instead of a series of boring-as-hell comics, we’ve gotten a completely confusing-as-hell comic! So, who the hell is Junior Bobcat talking about in the first panel? And what the hell are Senior Bobcat and Deke the Snitch talking about? Dissension? Threats? Whatever that’s all about, it sounds a whole lot more interesting than anything we’ve been seeing. Maybe Deke wandered over to Mark Trail and is trying to spice things up by providing plot points from a punchier, less yawn-inducing comic.

The only mystery solved today is how Maris made his money: Plurbing. It’s all about the plurbing in this town.

The Shroud Of The Wildcat Has Fallen. Begun, This Snoozefest Has.

10/7/11

“Do something about this kicking game, we must.”
“Why are you talking like that?”
“A Yoda thing, I am trying. Like it, do you?”
“Yeah. Hey thanks for your input. Look I gotta get somebody to explain Craig’s List to me. I think I’ll try to find a kicker on that. Then I’ll see if I can rent the movie Necessary Roughness. There was something in there about finding a hot chick to kick a ball.”
“There is no try…”
“Yeah, thanks Bill.”
“Wildcat, it is.”
“Okay, later I will smell you.”

Meanwhile, at Ed’s Diner…
10/8/11

Wildcat calls an impromptu meeting of his Booster inner circle. Soon, Gina the waitress will probably tell him to shut up because he’s disturbing the other diners with his blather. He’ll complain to Gina because everyone at the table has been nursing one cup of coffee and a couple bottles of Tabasco for an hour and a half.

“When I was captain of the Wildcats, I never waited for a refill!”
“Kiss my grits, Wildcat.”

Meanwhile, Gil stumbles aimlessly toward the next plot point with a lunch tray full of lunacy.

Edit-Yer-Own Comix Fun!

8/19/10

“Carl Peake Neal Rubin sabotaged Kemper’s opponents another summer? Why?”
“Half a dozen reasons tee times, all of them ridiculous early…”
“He has twice the potential blood alcohol level of these other kids cartoonists. He just needs to break through quit writing this strip so that someone who has the potential to make it less crappy can take over.”
“How would you know about potential?”
“You clearly have no idea what golf  is supposed to be never read Marmaduke!”

(For more edit-yer-own comix, check out this summer o’ 2008 edition!)

8/20/10

Hey look: Carl Peake has just completed the first-ever one-day full-body genital exchange: He’s gone from total dick to complete pussy in just 24 hours!

Jocks, Tuck: Pricks

4/24/10

4/26/10

The lesson is, as always, high school students are pricks. The jocks are too dumb to realize that it’s the music geeks who get all the action, and the musicians think that just because Marty Moon and Andy Capp attended their most recent show that their band only attract alcoholic degenerate cartoon characters. (Well that’s actually true. And not a bad thing. )

But even so, that bass player is a Tuck-head. He thinks they had  sub-par show because he unwittingly spent the whole time facing the back wall.

Wak of Love

So Steve takes a well deserved WAK! to the face for his smart-ass mouth and meddling ways. And Ray, being a distant cousin of Mark Trail, is inclined to punch anyone with suspicious facial hair. But even when being punched, Steve still has to be a jerk…defying the laws of physics by falling to the right from a punch to the right side of his mug. At least his glasses are with the program.

But then…someone with very nubby fingers comes to Steve’s rescue! Who could it be? While we’d all love to see Kaz get involved in fisticuffs, or possibly even Mr. Bakst or Clambake, money’s on Gil having finally stumbled in the door after knocking back a few at PUB then stopping off for some quick finger-shortening surgery.

Hulk-Thing, you make this blog sing

2/12/10

Sorry, folks, I didn’t plan to be in absentia for a couple days, right when Rubin runs things off the rails! (But can you really blame me for being lulled to sleep over the past two months?) It seems Steve “Fruity the” Luhm has become the Mary Worth of Milford High…He’s moved from meddling in the affairs of the coaches who don’t do anything anyway, to giving unsolicited advice to the losers at the school paper. Apparently since ol’ Fred Kotesky quit being their advisor, the Trumpet staff pretty much lets anyone wander in their offices and boss them around.

So why are Brock Reed and Duncan Daley like the Hulk and the Thing? I guess because they both smell horrible, walk around punching people while not wearing anything but tattered pants, and suck at basketball. Well clearly since this idea makes no sense, nobody in their right mind would let this confusingly bad concept catch on…right?

2/13/10

Oh right,  for one brief moment I forgot…we’re in crazy-ass Rubin world, where every couple of years the fans go completely bat-shit insane for one game with outrageous and ridiculously specific costumes. At least this time they aren’t so laughably racist. Instead they’re just plain stupid. Note that the most interesting couple in Milford wouldn’t be caught dead in a crowd of missing chromosomes like this mess of a panel one.

Well that about does it. (What, you ask?) The way I see it, the rest of the season can’t be topped by panel one. It just can’t. So I’ll have to spend the next several weeks reliving it and making sub-par “Hulk-Thing” penis jokes until I nod off again. Well, it’s been fun while it lasted.

2/15/10

See what I mean?

More Bored-er With Less Border

So I actually like Whigham’s experimental borderless first panel. That leaves Midget Gaddis free to roam the comic pages, to hit on Cathy or get unsolicited advice from Mary Worth (who will no doubt also throw him over her shoulder and give him that spanking he sorely deserves.) But he best watch out to not get mistaken for an extra in Family Circus and beome trapped in that circular ring of Hell forever. On the other hand, that would be a fitting punishment for 4’6″ Jamarrrrr, seeing as how he’s already severely agitated us in just a few days of appearances.

Yo, a little help?

4/22/09

Thanks to Molly Kinsella getting lost in the Crock desert for several days, where she proceeds to hallucinate about tennis balls, the Milford girls lose the game!

4/23/09

Meanwhile, a reluctant (mostly reluctant to have to look at the ugliest mug in Milford. Ugh, no more close-ups of Thumb Poser please!) Robb Larue is about to give Shep the bad news that Bill “Opie” Hawkins is already putting the moves on Molly. I mean, who else would it be? Also, he should explain that a wingman can only do his job for the pilot when the pilot didn’t previously crash face-first into a chemical waste dump.

And even more meanwhiler, I would have never imagined a legitimate comic would ever attempt a Gil Thorp cross-over, but apparently such a thing has now happened. Thanks to alert reader Debbie, here’s this Wednesday’s Lio:

I’d have to say the weirdest thing about this is that Lio is being attacked by the Frank Bolle-era Gil Thorp characters… More specifically, it’s the characters from March 4th of last year!

Thumbs up to Mark Tatulli for this cross-over, which still makes way more sense than the real strip ever does! Thoughts?