This Week in Milford

September 9, 2014

Eyes Wide Shut

Filed under: football, Milford Idiots, What the hell is going on here? — timbuys @ 5:15 am

September 9, 2014


First things, first: I never got around to seeing that movie. I am simply amused by True’s mannerism wherein he apparently bashfully closes his eyes to emphasize his humble ‘aw-shucks’ approach to this crazy life we call Milford.

Other thoughts? It doesn’t appear that Tip is in fact going for a Bobby Bittman look with his hair, but never mind that as I am in awe of his stilted dialogue. Hey, should True know who Jarrod is? I guess not so it’s a good thing Tip said his full name.

What’s going on in panel two? Ah, I see we were all going on two. Now, what comes after two? According to my three year old, seven. But here in Milford, after two comes panel three and… I guess what’s happening is that Art is examining a sheaf of carpet swatches while True, who is now an elf apparently, confirms Art’s fears that Gil has no intention of exploiting True for their mutual benefit.

September 6, 2014

Twin Sons of Different Mothers

Filed under: Gil Thorp, Milford Idiots, Secret Thoughts — teenchy @ 5:52 am

September 6, 2014


True repeats himself (more Memento-like dialogue!), dips his head and looks up menacingly at those to whom he believes himself superior. “The Quarterback” is a small man but a self-important douche with a sense of entitlement. Which one is Art’s son?

Hopefully True will address Jarrod as “The Quarterback” for the duration of their time together at Milford High. “Hey, ‘The Quarterback,’ bring me a cup of Gatorade and wash my jockstrap using the gentle cycle, willya?”

Funky sense of perspective going on here. Yesterday Jarrod approached True from behind/alongside and to True’s left – or at least it looked that way as True looked over his left shoulder to speak to him. Now True looks straight ahead at Jarrod, then again over his left shoulder as Jarrod walks away behind him.  Maybe “The Quarterback” was circling him like a shark.

Enough of that: let’s watch the cliques form! Tonsure boy over by the Tray Return is waiting to high-five Jarrod for the sick burn while two other guys are ready to join The Truman Show, though one less than willingly.  I can’t wait to see how the quarterback controversy divides the team and keeps them from the playdowns.


September 2, 2014

Maybe The Standishes Cut Their Own Hair

September 2, 2014


I hope everyone enjoyed their Labor Day holiday. If you’re like me, today is a day to slowly ease back into the work routine as we slog through the long holiday-less slog until Thanksgiving (unless you’re one of those lucky bastards who gets Columbus day off).

Speaking of slogging, quite a bit of exposition going on today and almost all of it is painfully obvious in panels one and two. There is quite a bit of attention given to the details of the Standish ‘dos’ though. Ya figure folks in the office give Art a hard time about his wildly mismatched sideburn lengths? If they do, it’s probably not to his face. I mean, look at the degree of menace in his gaze as he tries to stare down Gil in panel three.

Unfortunately for Art and the few things he and Gil have to discuss, generally speaking, once the person you’re negotiating with has what he wants from you (i.e., the services of True) and especially if he didn’t even really want that very much, you have none of what we in the Root Beer Sales and Distribution industry call ‘Beverage Leverage’. OK, no one calls it that: they just say leverage, but the point still stands. Nevertheless, this does set up an entertaining beat as we will have to wait until tomorrow to find out just what kind of power play Art is going to (hopefully hilariously) make. Gil has a long history of bringing his A game whenever anyone tries to make him take his job seriously, so hopefully the action is about to pick up!

Bonus points: Occluded background details galore in panel two. There are those windows of course, but for today I’d like to call out the fine squiggle art that Gil has hanging about a foot below his ceiling, the perfect height for hanging serious office artwork.

August 13, 2014

Howl At The Moon, Argue With The Sunshine

Filed under: Boredom in Milford, Gil Thorp, Milford Idiots — timbuys @ 5:00 am

August 13, 2014


Oh, hey! True is in fact talking about Miami of Ohio. Fascinating. I’m sure every kid who has played Coast football dreams of moving to the dreary mid-west just for the chance to go to a college that looks as though it’s ‘from an old movie’ because if there’s one thing that’s for sure, there are very few colleges out there that have architecture suggestive of times gone by. 

I’m sure if I thought about this more and put some effort into it, I’d have some neat links to share, but much like the artwork in panels two – how old timey!- and three – is that Mimi? Why is Gil’s head cranked up and away like that? – I’m going to have to just phone this one in. 

Update: I guess there’s a new interface for WordPress. Like any right thinking American, I hate and fear change. So, I have to say that without the time to figure out how it works and without regard for the fact that it’s got something of a WYSIWYG aspect to it, I’m going to have to go with: it sucks for now. 

August 12, 2014

The Tree Must Mean Something, But What?

Filed under: Boredom in Milford, Gil Thorp, Milford Idiots — timbuys @ 4:43 am

August 12, 2014


Let’s start last panel first: Miami you say? Sure, why not. Seems like a reasonable place for a three star recruit to get a chance to start at a school well known for producing head coaches. Oh wait, does True mean Miami as in the one down in Florida? Sure, that makes as much sense as anything. What recruit wouldn’t be chomping at the bit to play there?

OK, now that that’s out of the way, can someone tell me what’s the deal with the tree in panel one?

August 5, 2014

While True Standish Quietly Weeps

Filed under: Boredom in Milford, exposition comics, Milford Idiots — timbuys @ 4:47 am

August 5, 2014


Actually, I was thinking about setting today’s post to Smoke on the Water but a lack of time and talent on my part precludes me from doing so. Instead, we’ll do what I normally do when I got nothing to say and less time to say it in and go panel by panel.

Panel one: True poses for his cover shot in Sulky, Pouty teen magazine while wearing his sunglasses on top of his head in a tribute to the father who has left him to, you know, work at his job during the week.

Panel two: I tried to find the ‘in the absence of weights, I’m employing isometrics’ strip but that didn’t happen. Nevertheless, it is interesting to get to know that Jarrod is not only an
insufferable prick, but that he is likely delusional regarding his place in the world of high school athletics. I don’t know Jarrod, should True have heard about you?

Panel three: Not gonna lie, at first I skipped past the narration box, saw the flat-topped coach slumped in his chair drunk dialing Art Standish and wondered what it was that actually inspired Gil to do some follow up work. Then, I noticed the subtle things like the VaTech logos, the narration box plainly stating that we were ‘at Valley Tech’ and I realized that the only reason Gil is even able to pull off tying of second in the valley on a semi-regular basis is that the other coaches are just as loaded as he is. I can only wonder what those ‘wrinkles’ are and whether Art is peeved that he is taking a call from a drunken lout while he is no doubt prepping for some very important meeting. And, speaking of that, time for me to go prep for a not quite so important meeting.

August 2, 2014

He’s either with us, or against us

Filed under: freak hands, Gil Thorp, Milford Idiots — teenchy @ 7:00 am

August 2, 2014



Three stars doesn’t seem like a big deal when the star system goes up to 11 5 but it places you among the top 750 prospects and the top 10% of players in the country. A three-star high school player is deemed among the best players in his region. In True’s case, that would be the Coast, of course. (BTW is not yet a real thing but is, though it’s a Memphis-area basketball recruiting site, as is

And while 3-star guys have a fraction of the likelihood of being drafted by an NFL team as 4- and 5-star guys it’s not out of the question and many factors can dramatically raise a 2- or 3-star guy’s value after he’s in college. The immediately linked article summarizes them as a major growth spurt in college, playing high school ball in an under-scouted area (or having little or no game film to promote himself), or a lack of experience.

Anyway Mongo there seems pretty impressed. Shuford, who couldn’t remember True’s last name yesterday, can remember that he wasn’t committed to Milford.

Meanwhile over at the Center City Hilt, the seeds of The Truman Show coming to Milford may be getting planted. True supposedly has experience given his game film on and growth spurts can’t really be predicted (or can they?), but how can he expect to get showcased in a program where the players know more about national high school football prospects than their blissfully ignorant coach?

July 31, 2014

Scenes from Janet’s Diner

Filed under: Boredom in Milford, exposition comics, football, Gil Thorp, Milford Idiots — teenchy @ 5:23 am

July 31, 2014


I am sitting
Here in Milford
At the diner
Named for Janet
I am drinking
A Coke bought me
By a kid
Named Truman Standish

We were talking
About college
And before
I mention EMU
I am looking
O’er my shoulder
At somebody
Coming in

It is only
Austin Shuford
He’s a run-
ning back for Milford
He is looking
For a cold drink
They don’t have them
At his practice

And I look
The other way
As they are shaking
Their hellos
And I’m pretending
Not to notice
His moustache
Like Groucho Marx

I open
Up the whiskey
And I slip it
In my soda
I might die
While I am drinking
Might be better
Than this blather

And I’m tuning
Out the niceties
And thinking
About Mimi
Will she feed me
More potato salad?
I hope
Not for God’s sake

There stands Shuford
With his cold drink
Leaning too close
To True Standish
No he does not
Really know True
‘Cause he does
Not watch Coast football

And I’m trying
Not to notice
That his cup’s not
From this diner
What if I
Asked him where it came from?
“It came
From Marty Moon”

“Oh, I grew
Up on the freeways”
“Have you heard of
Luckey Haskins?
“I am mov-
ing to the Valley”
I am thinking
Of Mimi…

And of the ‘tater salad
And the swimming pool
Before the two-a-days

And I finish up my soda
And it’s time to hang with Kaz

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