This Week in Milford

October 22, 2016

Backing Up (Like a Dump Truck)


Kevin Pelwecki may not have a poster of the right guard on his wall, but does he have Groucho Marx and Chuck McCann in his medicine cabinet?

Here we were for the past couple of days remarking on how this strip portrays football positions in dialog balloons as abbreviations and wondering whether Milfordians pronounced them as abbreviations, and now here are kids sounding out the full name of each position. In so doing The Secret Pelwecki shows himself to be yet another in a very long line of Milford Idiots who want nothing more than to be the defensive lineman right guard center of attention. I blame reality television.

Then – hey y’all, look! It’s a rare Coach Shaw spotting – and with more lines than just about ever. He’s setting us up for the fifth-string QB‘s transition into the third-string TE. Kaz, however, has had enough of his talk. By doing an end-around to snatch Coach Shaw’s MATT mug, Kaz asserts his dominance over Coach Shaw and maintains his status as beta male on the Milford sidelines.

October 21, 2016

Because I’m an insufferable douche that’s why.

Filed under: Gil Thorp, lame jokes, Milford Idiots, What the hell is going on here? — robmize2013 @ 7:49 pm

So now Gil has 5 QB’s and no tight ends. Unless he counts his ass and Kaz’s, which makes 2.  (I’m here all week.)  Nice roster management.

I now get the feeling that Pelweki may be recruited to play tight end, since why the hell would he need to watch FILM with 4 other guys? They need 5 quarterbacks like Gil needs a lemonade stand in the summer. If Gil already had 4, no way would he waste time with Kevin at practice, not if he had connected brain cells.  Every plot turn gets more ridiculous then the last in this strip. Next we’ll see Heather trying out for tight end. You watch. I’ll stay in bed.

October 20, 2016

Après Moi, Le Pelwecki


So now Kevin is the fifth-string quarterback, between the Mississippi National Guard and the League of Women Voters. No actual word on who the second-, third- or fourth-stringers are. Also no word as to why The Secret Pelwecki is getting some reps under center. Maybe Gil thought he hadn’t made enough belittling dickish comments for the day.

Finally, no word on how Rick Scott knows how Pete DeWindt hurt himself on that big block. Perhaps he is The Injury Whisperer, much as his new understudy Heather fancies herself The Quarterback Whisperer. I suppose this presages the position switch The Real Pelwecki tipped us off to: not to QB but to TE (as this strip prints it). I’m sure Gil will cook up a play that lets him make a handoff – some kind of reverse or double reverse.

October 19, 2016

I, For One, Refuse To Believe That Gil’s Flattop Would Wilt In Any But The Most Cataclysmic Deluge

Filed under: freak hands, Gil Thorp, Marty Moon — timbuys @ 7:36 am


Anyone out there familiar with protocols for calling off a game? I would think that if you’re waiting until you see lightning, you’re waiting too long. I do kind of like the notion of Marty losing his vintage 2008 MacBook to a lightning strike though… Also, I kind of like the fact that Marty refers to PUB as home.

October 18, 2016

This Is The Stuff

Filed under: actual action, football, Just Plain Awesome — timbuys @ 7:22 am


Marty Moon is going to give Gil so much hell about allowing the game to continue with lightning in the vicinity… But who cares about that? Today’s strip is one of the best we’ve seen in a long time.


October 17, 2016

Pete De Windt: Sloppy Hog

Filed under: actual action, football — nedryerson @ 3:41 am


The rain soaked game continues. It’s all ponchos and slop. Is that line coach Steve Boone barking out to his lineman, aka hogs, to slug it out in the slop? Hogs do enjoy slop. You know who really loves him some slop? TE Pete De Windt! He loves slippin’ and slidin’ in the slop and throwing big, explosive blocks so that Milford can move, sloppily. Stay sloppy, Pete!

Edited to add: I can’t believe I missed the chance to throw in a few obscure pop culture references. First, I could have used the Devo song Sloppy (I Saw My Baby Getting) and second, the Frank Zappa line: Is that a real poncho or a Sears poncho? Oh well, I still get paid the same. (Also, there is really no decent video for the Devo song. They didn’t make a proper video for the song and all of the live ones on Youtube look and/or sound like crap.)

October 15, 2016

Too Wet for a Bonfire, I Reckon


Milford is looking like Carter-Finley Stadium did last weekend and Gil has been following Notre Dame’s game plan. Why he has Hakeem throwing the ball in this weather is beyond me. Time for deus ex trainer Heather Burns to step in, tell Gil that The Secret Pelwecki has been practicing handoffs all week in the cafeteria and should step in to replace Archer. Gil will then either (a) ignore Heather’s advice, leading to Hakeem bungling a handoff and to a Mudlark loss (shouldn’t Mudlarks like playing in the mud?), or (b) take Heather’s advice and let Pelwecki lead the Mudlarks to victory, then admit that a girls’ soccer washout can do a better job of coaching his team than he can.

I’ll admit this contrivance isn’t what we might have been expecting but this arc is feeling just a bit too contrived. If only the girl kicker meme had been carried through; combined with the tough girl characters Rubin’s been introducing (if not developing) in the past several arcs, we could’ve been treated to a scenario similar to what North Penn (PA) football fans were treated to recently.

metapost: Thanks to Tim for covering for me on extremely short notice this past Thursday.

October 14, 2016

Handing off his lunch

Filed under: actual action, Gil Thorp — robmize2013 @ 6:07 pm

So now we see the equipment bag in its full glory; Heather pulled ONE football out of that monstrosity. Another silly idea – bring 1 football in a huge bag. Then we have silly idea #2 – Kevin handing a bag of – chips? – to a surprised student. Great idea to practice with chips – shove em right in someone’s  belly and watch the bag open to a crumbling mess. Lovely. Pass the dip please. He could hand off his term paper like that too; how about a pair of glasses to an umpire. Garbage to the janitor. Books to the librarian. A balloon to a clown. A sack of coins to his banker. With interest of course.

The home opener on October 14; even the Nats and Dodgers got done before this. And no bonfire in this soggy mess; a blessing for some, a fumble-fest for some others.

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