This Week in Milford

April 29, 2016

You make me feel so young..

Filed under: big arms, general nonsense, Gil Thorp, Just plain sad, Milford Weirdos — robmize2013 @ 6:39 pm

And the rest of the lineup continues with Ron Hall only playing outfield when 2 guys are pitching, and will pick his nose the rest of the time. Looks like our friend Bobby Howry is listening to the interview on the radio while reading his newspaper. How 2016! Who the hell listens to radios while reading the paper anymore? I used to, but now I do 1 or the other. Lack of seniors bodes well for the future, but too many young players means theyre not used to varsity level ball. Why would asking the boys parents about this make any difference? Hey – you guys shouldve had your kid a year earlier, then he’d be a senior by now. Yep.

Meanwhile Drink-u-Bader is ready for his trip to the lawyers to explain why its ok to be intoxicated behind the wheel when surely there’s an Uber driver at the push of a button. I like the thickness of Mrs. Baders right arm – she looks like she’s been pumping more iron then the ballplayers. Mister is gonna try to bribe his way out of license hell with some cold cash.  Oh – how is he getting to this meeting without a car or driver?  Stay tuned—

To the dance floor –

 

April 28, 2016

BFFs, not FWBs

Filed under: baseball, exposition comics, freak hands, Gil Thorp, Marty Moon, Neal's friends — teenchy @ 4:50 am

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I could speculate all morning on what led to Boo Radley’s declaration in P1 but in the interest of (my) time I’m sticking with “True’s moving to North Carolina this summer and I’m not.” Also not sure where the “preppie” tag comes from; that subculture has practically died out, and I don’t recall seeing True sporting Vineyard Vines’ little whale, among other telltales. I mean, even Brooks Brothers did away with its boxy traditional fit dress shirts and now offer cuts in trim, skinny, super skinny and “I wear girls’ jeans.” (Sure they still show “Traditional Fit” but try ordering one.) Maybe if I looked at the color version of the strip I’d see his pants were pink Breton red with little nautical flags on them.

Then it’s off to the bleachers where Gil gives Marty the full Mouseketeer Roll Call. True, Lalonde, and Granger are returning from last season. Don’t have time to Google the rest (have at it, TWIMers) but we know Ken Brown makes things happen and Bobby Mitchell integrated that NFL team than now often remains nameless.

Also not gonna speculate on what kind of smartphone Marty’s using to record Gil but – holy crap does Marty have a huge thumb! Props to him for stepping up from the old Dictaphone, even if it isn’t as stealthy as Marjie’s invisible recording device from last year.

April 27, 2016

There Must Be A Pop Culture Reference I’m Missing Here

Filed under: Boredom in Milford — timbuys @ 5:02 am

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The girls swing by as they apparently are wont to do in Milford and Boo calls True Biff for reasons which elude me. Major plot point for today? Gil has well and truly given up on protecting True’s arm. Take that faithful followers of whatever message board Wake Forest football fans frequent!

ETA – Edited To Alliterate

April 26, 2016

Who Fist Bumps Through A Chain Link Fence?

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The Bader’s are rocketing up the charts of terrible Gil Thorp father-son lead characters today.  I suppose the lesson to learn is that jerks have a proportionately higher chance of raising jerky kids? I dunno… Perhaps it’s too early to seek out a moral here.

April 25, 2016

Kaz Lowers The Shades

Filed under: Coach Kaz — nedryerson @ 5:40 am

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As it turns out, we’ve only just begun to get to know Barry Bader, who (pending disciplinary action) will ply his scrappy skills at second this year. It turns out, Barry is more than just scrappy. He’s kind of mouthy and not in a good way. He’s mouthy in more of a douche like way. This is not going to serve him well when he has to start driving his father to industrial solvent sales calls in Central City. Those ruffians do not abide any lip from anybody, and they have a special fondness for punishing the pint-sized.

Great appearance by Kaz today. Way to keep it cool, big fellah.

April 23, 2016

Is Exploding Ear Flap Syndrome a Thing?

Filed under: actual action, baseball, Coach Kaz, Exploding Eyeball Syndrome, Gil Thorp — teenchy @ 7:50 pm

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If you came to read today’s strip expecting Barry Bader to already be catching crap about his dad’s DUI, you’ll be disappointed. (I know I was.) Guess that news hasn’t traveled as fast as the news of Kenzie Hanley’s jaw-breaking incident at the Winter Blast. All in good time, I’m sure.

We do at least get the beginnings of the Mouseketeer Roll Call with the returning Mike Granger playing Schroeder to pitcher Lalonde’s Charlie Brown. If this is the same Lalonde from last season, he’s a converted outfielder. There’s a Kaz sighting as a base ump, but that’s about the size of it. As a fan of baseball history I’ve been used to seeing “pint-sized” as an adjective describing 1950’s outfielder Ernie Oravetz; given that Master Bader is a second baseman, however, I expect there’ll be a José Altuve name drop somewhere along the line. Being an aggressive baserunner doesn’t necessarily make one a psycho, and telegraphing it to everyone within earshot isn’t really qualifying material either. No, I’d be on the lookout for more Piersallesque behavior before I slapped that tag on him.

 

 

 

April 22, 2016

DOA – drunk on arrival

Filed under: actual action, baseball, Gil Thorp, lessons learned — robmize2013 @ 6:44 pm

Looks like mister Bader has a drinking problem – the cop wrote him up for driving under the influence and I’m sure made him blow into a tube or whatever they blow into, and his reading was such above the limit that she told him he needed a driver for his trip home. So here we are, with his wife listening to him rationalizing. She needs to tell him to either go to an AA meeting or she’ll take him, because this looks like its going downhill until he admits he has a problem. Since he’s getting a lawyer, he must have had this happen enough for his license to be suspended, so she needs to have a backbone and tell him- I’m not driving you anywhere else until you clean up. Not sure she will though..

and in P3 an unnamed slugger (Bader junior?) is taking his cuts against a human pitcher instead of a pitching machine or coach, which at this point would be more helpful to the team.

April 21, 2016

“Car Trouble,” Seriously?

Filed under: exposition comics, freak hands, Gil Thorp, Milford Idiots — teenchy @ 5:34 am

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Mother Bader could be Granny Bader for all we know; those perfectly round eyeglass frames and her suddenly narrowed features throw off a serious Al-Jo Ames Irene Ryan vibe.

Love how she whips out the “car trouble” card on the fly, the way folks used to throw out “female trouble” when a woman was in the hospital for, oh, say, a hysterectomy. Impoundment is a form of car trouble so credit for that.

Meanwhile tonsured little Master Bader obliviously shovels dinner into his face, unaware that dad Del will soon be either out of a job or peddling industrial solvents while pedaling and getting called “Dewey.” Could coaching Milford baseball as community service be in his future as well?

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