This Week in Milford

December 9, 2008

Gunning for Nutboys, one last time.

Filed under: actual action, Swifti Mart — jasbeattie @ 11:24 am


Holy crap! A hooded and sneakered assailant whom we all hope is Marty Moon, but probably isn’t, is robbing the Swifti Mart of all its Nutboys (“Nutboy: It’s still shitty, even when stolen!”) as well as all the money in the till. Since Ashley was born well after 1957, she doesn’t know what the hell a till is, and will soon be shot dead protecting the case of Nutboys (“Nutboy: It’s shitty, but possibly worth dying for if you work in a convenience store!”)

In case you couldn’t tell already, I’m using this post as a probable last chance to discuss Nutboys* (“Nutboy: It’s shitty and stale as this joke!”) since they’ll soon be lost to the annals of silly crap that appeared in Gil Thorp once but was truly awesome anyway, much like Androgynous Mullet Person!

*More information on Nutboys (“Nutboy: It’s over!”) can be found on yesterday’s internet.


  1. Um, what the hell is going on in panel 2? It appears that a car window is talking to Ashley while an explosion goes off behind her ear.

    Totally confusing.

    Comment by 5-4 Emptyeye — December 9, 2008 @ 11:49 am

  2. Sneakers and sweatpants don’t seem right for Marty. Bare feet and pajama pants, yes. Moon boots and Sansabelt slacks, sure.

    Maybe it’s Andrew Gregory’s dad, back from the jungle or wherever it is he goes.

    Comment by KarenD — December 9, 2008 @ 11:52 am

  3. Well, Josh is planning Nutboys t-shirts, so it may never go away entirely.

    Comment by Mac Thomason — December 9, 2008 @ 11:57 am

  4. Panel 1: I think the robber is wearing roller skates.

    Panel 2: It’s for sure not Marty Moon. He’d never call anyone “Darlin.” Unless, of course, he’s been hitting the Dickel Sour Mash…

    Panel 3: Holy shit, wotta gun! Suddenly Whigham is channeling “Sin City” or something.

    How to Perpetuate the Nut-Boy Angle: After Hoodie is arrested, his hotshot lawyer will plead the Nut-Boy Defense. Too hopped up on sugary treats to realize the consequences of his actions. Felt irresistable compulsion to steal Nut-Boys. Expert testimony that the secret ingredient in Nut-Boys is crack cocaine.

    Comment by johnw — December 9, 2008 @ 12:03 pm

  5. And I’m telling you son,
    Well, it ain’t no fun
    Staring straight down a forty-four.

    Especially one controlled by a Giant Freak Hand!

    Kissing Linda Lu or a case of Nutboys????? hmmmmm.

    Comment by El Lumpbo — December 9, 2008 @ 12:20 pm

  6. Could it not be Dixie Julep (from Judge Parker)? If it’s Dixie Julep, Ashley, say “Have another Nutboy, sir — they’re on the house.”

    Comment by laura — December 9, 2008 @ 12:46 pm

  7. Just another day at CSI: Milford.

    David Caruso: “Poor Ashley. Just a regular day stocking Nutboys…”

    *puts on sunglasses*

    David Caruso: “… and had to run into a boy who’s nuts.”


    Comment by El Santo — December 9, 2008 @ 12:48 pm

  8. Holy shnikes! Somebody’s gotta stop this robbery! But who? Kaz? Gil? Marty Moon? Sacko and the Rajah? Stormy? That lady congresswoman?

    Comment by Don, the Rebel without a Blog — December 9, 2008 @ 1:31 pm

  9. There’s a Darth Vader helmet sticking out the side of that gun. Awww, it’s kind of cute! I can see the headlines now: “Nutboys Stolen by Man with Adorable Weapon”

    Or maybe Marty will break up this attempted robbery when he stumbles into the Smarti Mart (or something – I’m too lazy to scroll back up and see what it is) for another bottle of wine, and cracks the guy over the head with a giant spicy salami. “Man, I’m tryin to buy shome boozhe here! And I’ll take the shalami, too.”

    Comment by jules — December 9, 2008 @ 3:06 pm

  10. Maybe it’s Cully gone back over to the dark side. The clothes certainly work. With his mental capacity, he would probably be more interested in the Nutboys than the cash anyway.

    Comment by meathook — December 9, 2008 @ 3:48 pm

  11. Don, the only one who can stop this robbery is the king of the Jungle Patrol, Big Ray.

    I’m prayin’ I’m right and the man behind the freak hand and gun is Marty (I lost my job, now I gotta fence Nutboys to survive and get my booze) Moon.

    Comment by Regina — December 9, 2008 @ 4:26 pm

  12. I’m convinced this whole story line is based on Whigham jonesin’ to draw a gun.

    Comment by gwilo — December 9, 2008 @ 4:27 pm

  13. Queen Regina ==> #12 from yesterday: Are you channeling Mr. Rubin or something? You actually predicted a plot! All hail the Queen! Com’on now, brilliant one, tell us what IBM or GE will close at tomorrow!

    Comment by SemperFi4evr — December 9, 2008 @ 4:41 pm

  14. Business just picked up.

    Comment by jc — December 9, 2008 @ 4:58 pm

  15. “Forget the money, just give me the Nutboys !”

    Comment by blondie — December 9, 2008 @ 11:52 pm

  16. Today’s strip is leaving me sorely disappointed.

    Comment by James G — December 10, 2008 @ 6:34 am

  17. […] now infamous December 8th comic, Ashley is seen getting ready to stock a case of Nutboys, and in the following day’s installment, the “PROFESSIONAL CRIMINAL ROBBER PERSON” proceeds to steal that case of […]

    Pingback by Zagnuts to this! « This Week in Milford — March 29, 2009 @ 10:55 pm

  18. […] pretty much everyone who’s been reading Gil Thorp since at least 2008 knew it’s for Swifti Mart. My fact-checking and institutional memory, like a Nutboy, is […]

    Pingback by That First Hit Won’t Come on the Ballfield | This Week in Milford — June 2, 2016 @ 6:16 am

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