This Week in Milford

December 31, 2011

Tats All for 2011

Filed under: Coach Kaz, freak hands, google nonsense, lessons learned — nedryerson @ 7:04 am

12/30/11

The Ric Devore love fest continues!

I mean, look at him Marjie! Those freckles, that freaky hand, his science-y t-shirt, have you ever seen such a slender soph? We don’t want to tell you how to do your job, Marjie, but there’s your lead. Not this tat-slappin’ business! I mean, what kind of tool even gets a tattoo anyway? Oh, um sorry Kaz.

Yeah, well I hate my dumb tattoo. I don’t know what it is and I regret having gotten it, but you can slap it if you want Marjie. Do you want to slap it? I’ll slap it for you if that’s something you’re into. What, huh? Oh yeah, Rick Devore…look at that sweet wristband, soooo much cooler that this eyesore on my, admittedly much larger, bicep.

12/31/11

So Kaz was with the NCAA D2 national champion Northern Colorado Bears. That would have been 1996 or 1997, according to our crack research staff.

Intrepid reporter Marjie Ducey wants some answers though: Now about that alleged “barbed wire” tattoo, well okay, it kinda looks like you’re being treated with leeches, but what about that tribal thing on your other arm? Did you go full on Matt Prater crazy and just forget about it?

Oh Marjie, you’ll have to refer those kinds of questions to Coach Whigrub, he handles continuity. I think he’s in the training room or something, or maybe he called in sick. We’ve got to get back to practice. Flipper boy is almost done with today’s tai chi session.

Happy New Year everybody!

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31 Comments »

  1. What up wit dat???? Knoxy —-> friggin’ Gildo is a fellow soldier of the sea / teufel hunden / leatherneck. What a catastrastroke! I’m gonna burn all the USMC stuff I have ‘cept my DD 214 [expiration of enlistment paper]. Hey, you Borracho, Semper Eff Off! You’re a disgrace to the eagle globe and anchor. Wonder how many blanket parties he got…

    Comment by semperfi4evr — December 31, 2011 @ 9:24 am

  2. He regrets the tattoo, but not the mullet? Kaz. You have got to get your priorities straight.

    Comment by jules — December 31, 2011 @ 2:21 pm

  3. Yeesh. This is turning into an Afterschool Special almost as lame as your average Mary Worth plot. “Don’t get a tattoo, kids, no matter how cool it might seem! You’ll regret it later!”

    Yeah, you’ll regret it when Tat-Slap Magic wears off and you go on a losing streak that’ll keep you out of the playdowns (yet again). Those Block-M tattoos will be as embarrassing an emblem of failure as the 1980 Detroit Lions’ video of “Another One Bites The Dust,” issued when the team started out 3-0 and then stumbled to a 6-7 record the rest of the way. Forever remembered as “Another One Beats Our Butts.”

    Yes, longsuffering Lions fan here. Don’t know what to make of the current team; I keep expecting the inevitable disappointment. Kinda like being a Mudlarks fan.

    Comment by jvwalt — December 31, 2011 @ 2:49 pm

  4. In the last panel 12/31 Kaz is doing a nice Wolverine impression.

    Comment by Moon Mullins — December 31, 2011 @ 3:39 pm

  5. So. Gil was once a Devil Dog. I think we should cross-examine Whigrub. Which regiment? Which camps? When? His reference to being “in the Marines” rather than “in the Marine Corps” doesn’t ring right. Too much like a pilot saying “plane” instead of “airplane.”

    Comment by vaganova — December 31, 2011 @ 3:59 pm

  6. Gil didn’t actually say he’d been a Marine, just that he didn’t get a tattoo there.

    Comment by Dale — December 31, 2011 @ 6:01 pm

  7. I’d alwyas thought as much before, but now that he’s admitted to having served in the USMC I am finally convinced that Whigrub has grafted Ted Williams’ head in a jar onto Gil’s body.

    Comment by delvaldawg — December 31, 2011 @ 6:04 pm

  8. delvaldawg, you have a point– do you recall that Gil flies, and at one point early in the strip owned his own airplane? For those not acquainted with Ted’s service record, he was a fighter pilot in the USMC in both WW II and Korea.

    Comment by vaganova — December 31, 2011 @ 6:10 pm

  9. Good call, Dale – “The Marines” is the name of a bar where Gil once turned down the opportunity to get a tattoo. One of his wiser moves, no doubt.

    Comment by jules — December 31, 2011 @ 6:16 pm

  10. Bulls-eye as usual, Jules….

    Comment by vaganova — December 31, 2011 @ 10:23 pm

  11. The Kaz regrets his tattoos? I don’t buy it for a minute.
    This is the same guy who umpired rec league softball in a sleeveless shirt.

    I want to say Gil’s military background was part of his backstory when Berrill drew the strip, but I don’t remember that for sure. Lost in the summer of Gail Martin, though, was Whigham’s last reference to Gil in the military, recalling his days of boxing in the ARMY, not the Marines. This allowed him to turn Bill Ritter into a Valley Tech punk punching machine.

    Comment by billytheskink — December 31, 2011 @ 11:40 pm

  12. Hey! I also didn’t get a tattoo in the marines! Or at the UN general assembly or At the Nobel Prize award ceremony.

    Comment by Salinger — January 1, 2012 @ 3:25 am

  13. 1-12: Whew, I feel a lot better! The years of heavy drinking are taking their toll on the Gilmeister. Maybe it wasn’t even the army… maybe it really was some other kid took exception to his toolishness in the Cub Scouts and beat him bloody.

    Comment by semperfi4evr — January 1, 2012 @ 8:38 am

  14. Thanks vaganova. Now I’m just waiting for baseball season and Gil to whip out his faded old Washington Senators cap. (I still have mine!)

    Happy New Year Mudlark followers!

    Comment by delvaldawg — January 1, 2012 @ 9:57 am

  15. billytheskink — Well, you hang around Gil long enough, and the regrets begin to multiply.

    Comment by jvwalt — January 1, 2012 @ 11:59 am

  16. get a coverup then kaz and just take marcy darcey to a cheap motel and get your frustrations out or areyu mad gils been tappin her ass for years

    Comment by mr12ozcan — January 1, 2012 @ 12:24 pm

  17. billytheskink–Gil’s military background: he just got out of USMC when he came to the Milford campus in fall 1958. When Gil was “recalling his days of boxing in the ARMY” I wondered why the “branch transfer”…..

    Comment by rowdyman — January 1, 2012 @ 7:58 pm

  18. Wow! Rowdyman remembers all the way back! I remember the airplane, and talking kids out of their after school jobs to play football, but neither the USMC nor the much more recent Army reference. Maybe Whigrub has been confused by those goofy new US Army semi-dress uniforms, which can look a little like old-style Marine semi-dress. @delvaldawg– not sure if it was Ted’s hand which doomed the (second) Washington Senators or not, but I do know he had a hard time relating to players who did not have his manic focus.

    Comment by vaganova — January 1, 2012 @ 8:56 pm

  19. Thanks for clarifying rowdyman. Kudos.

    Comment by billytheskink — January 2, 2012 @ 1:42 am

  20. And all this timeI thought Kaz got that dumb tattoo because he was enamored with Pamela Anderson’s in “Barbwire”.

    Comon Gil, fess up about that tat on your nether regions that says “Johnny Walker 4 ever” that you got one drunken night.

    Comment by Regina — January 2, 2012 @ 7:22 am

  21. Semperfi- I thought the same thing, but then Dale cleared things up. There wasn’t enough room in the panel for him to say “I didn’t get one in the Marines, because I was too busy being in the Army. In Delueth. Flipping burgers in the mess hall.”

    Comment by Knoxy — January 2, 2012 @ 8:36 am

  22. @vaganova: Teddy Ballgame could not relate to players who lacked his talent, and was especially disdainful of pitchers. Some years ago I got to know Ted’s pitching coach, the late Sid Hudson, on a friendly basis and he confirmed as much.

    As for the factors that led to the demise of Nats v2.0 I won’t get into them here. Suffice it to say that I’ve been taking pleasure in the Texas Rangers’ inability to win the World Series. Similarly while I’m happy to have a team wearing “Walgreens baseball caps” (my brother-in-law’s term) to root for again, I feel some remorse for the hardcore fans of les Expos de Montreal.

    Comment by delvaldawg — January 2, 2012 @ 9:06 am

  23. Funny, delvaldawg, but the Texas Rangers (Senators 2) have never seemed legitimate to me, while the Twins (Senators 1) have. I had heard those things about Williams too, and am glad to have them confirmed. I do know he was outraged when one of his players would make an out and not be able to tell him what the pitch was that he has struck out on, grounded to short, or whatever. I guess that if you’re able to decide whether to swing by observing the movement of the stitches on the baseball, you probably do get impatient with mere mortals.

    Comment by vaganova — January 2, 2012 @ 12:08 pm

  24. I always heard the story about Ted seeing the ball so clearly, that it may as well have been in slow motion. I always had good eyesight in my ball playing days, but there was no way I could pick up the rotation.

    I figure somewhere around comment 30 we’ll get back to this inane story line. In the meantime, only a little over a month until pitchers and catchers…..the true first day of Spring…………..

    Comment by Knoxy — January 2, 2012 @ 4:46 pm

  25. Williams had astonishing eyesight, but he also took batting practice until his hands bled. I am sure there are lots of guys out there with his raw talent, or more, whom we will never hear of.

    Whigrub, you listening, guys? This tattoo story is leaving a lot of us behind…

    Comment by vaganova — January 2, 2012 @ 8:51 pm

  26. I would contribute something to the Ted Williams conversation, but only to say that there was a little bit of info about Williams and the Senators in the book about Curt Flood (A Well Paid Slave) as Flood was signed to the Senators following his year in limbo when he refused to report after being traded to the Phillies. I don’t remember there being much in the way of any detail of Williams interacting with Flood (whose heart clearly wasn’t in it as he left the team after about a month and never played again). There was something about Williams not getting along with Denny McLain, but McLain didn’t want to be there either (and by most accounts was a jerk and had already been suspended for involvement in gambling).

    What I took away from this (which is mostly an aside from the larger issue of Flood and the challenge to the reserve clause) is that the Senators were making ill advised personnel decisions. I’m sure the problems are detailed more elaborately elsewhere, but wanted to talk about something other than tattoos.

    Comment by Ned Ryerson — January 3, 2012 @ 9:50 am

  27. Bingo, Ned– few of us seem to have a lot to say about tats.

    But about Curt Flood? One of the most valuable defensive outfielders I’ve ever seen, along with Mays and Ichiro. I’ve always thought he should have made the Hall just on his merits as a player, but he appears to sacrificed that in order to end baseball’s version of indentured servitude. What an irony that his treatment for terminal throat cancer left the man who spoke for all players unable to speak at all…

    Comment by vaganova — January 3, 2012 @ 12:53 pm

  28. Ned, you are correct. Another great book on point is “Kiss It Goodbye,” which was written by one of the Nats announcers at the time, Shelby Whitfield. Poor personnel decisions (e.g. the Denny McLain deal), and increased ticket prices by owner/GM Bob Short (who hired Gil – oops, Ted to manage as a drawing card) led to lower attendance and a poorer on-field product. Whitfield is among those who believed the McLain trade was made to get the Tigers’ ownership to support Short’s move of the franchise to Texas. (Recall that he had done the same thing with the NBA’s Minneapolis Lakers.)

    Whitfield’s book is out-of-print but not hard to find. It’s great reading – funny, sad and at times sparking outrage.

    Now to see how many kids have gotten “block M” tats…

    Comment by delvaldawg — January 3, 2012 @ 1:08 pm

  29. Much as this storyline stinks (plus ça change, plus c’est la même chose), at least there’s an upside. Marjie Ducey’s all over this breaking story. Berets, anyone?

    Comment by Dood — January 3, 2012 @ 1:48 pm

  30. -” I wondered why the “branch transfer”…..-

    Don’t ask…don’t tell…

    Comment by Marty Moon Fan Club — January 4, 2012 @ 11:42 pm

  31. […] know Kaz is on record as regretting getting his tat, but if it has the power to migrate from one arm to the other, it must be pretty […]

    Pingback by Come for the Gun Show, Stay for the Hypotheticals | This Week in Milford — March 11, 2017 @ 12:02 pm


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