This Week in Milford

January 4, 2012

The Mark of the Beast-Girl

Filed under: basketball, Coach Kaz, Exploding Eyeball Syndrome, Milford Weirdos — jasbeattie @ 1:39 am


Hey everyone, guess what! Milford has a girls’ basketball team now! And Michael Strahan Tasha Somebody-or-other wants to intimidate people by means other than frightening them with an extreme close-up of her mug. So why not get the Milford M, inked on using the standard 1952 Viewmaster equipment?


Regulations require that as soon as Tasha Strahan comes onto the court, for their own safety everyone must keep their eyes closed at all times…It’s like an Arc of the Covenant kinda thing. So the fact that anyone has scored or rebounded at all is a minor miracle. Hope you’ve been keeping your eyes closed too. Bonk! Let’s just move on…


Yes, Kayla. The tattoo wields magical rebounding power. Now Trisha is off to ask how much it takes to tat the ugly off her face. Now that would be magic.

Meanwhile, the real magic of tattoos we’re learning is they are beginning to turn Kaz into a whiny bitch. Oh Kaz…please don’t complaining about your bad-ass accessories. What next? You’re not going to tire of the mullet and pearl earrings are you? (Don’t you remember when you kicked ass?)




  1. 1/3 P2: Tasha (#23?!? Seriously – MJ’s number?) is rebounding with her eyes closed so that she doesn’t accidentially see her own reflection on the backboard glass!

    Come on, Kaz – you know you can’t make changes when on a winning streak. Now the team will start to question the power of the mighty “M” tattoo and go on a losing streak. Do you hear Mimi talking about her butterfly tat on her lower back with the girls team? NO, because she knows the psychie of the tat just led to a win.

    Maybe the Milford Ink team of Ranson and Kitten are really Gil’s long-lost kids, coming home to make some bucks off the family’s gullible school kid relations!

    Comment by Milfordian — January 4, 2012 @ 7:08 am

  2. Just who is this Tasha? Tasha Yar, who succumbed to the oil-tar-pit creature in an early STNG episode?

    Tattoos aside, can someone grab the pump and air up Cortez Beecher before he completely deflates?

    Comment by Dood — January 4, 2012 @ 9:06 am

  3. NOBODY would get a tattoo with a border around it to make it look like a patch. The last thing Tasha has to worry about is scaring her opponents…..she’s got a mug that would make a train take a dirt road. I hope Kaz doesn’t decide to show off his barbed wire tramp stamp.

    Comment by Knoxy — January 4, 2012 @ 9:23 am

  4. Why do all the women in Milford look like men? I thought the chick(?) Michelle Strahan was talking to was a guy. Also Michelle needs to do something about that bad acne. I wonder what douchey tattoo she’ll get.

    Michelle Strahan doesn’t need a tattoo to be intimidating. That face alone would scare Dracula, the Frankenstein monster and the Wolfman.

    Kaz having tattoo regret?? He is turning into a a bitch. Put on a dress why dontcha, Kaz?

    Comment by Regina — January 4, 2012 @ 9:51 am

  5. 1/2 P3: Hey, Chief Whigham, Mad magazine called; they want Alfred E.Neuman back!

    Comment by semperfi4evr — January 4, 2012 @ 10:09 am

  6. Tasha, your team has established a precedent for head shaving.
    I’d be intimidated.

    Comment by Dale — January 4, 2012 @ 12:48 pm

  7. kaz is such a bitch now . hope he doesnt show the team his prince albert or he will get suspended by hobart or that old lady. i dont think tasha goes to milford i just think she is intimadating mimi for some food and drug money because she got cut from wnba.and mimi is not opposed to using a ringer for some victorys.

    Comment by mr12ozcan — January 4, 2012 @ 6:59 pm

  8. Milfordian has nailed it!!
    HRONK! BONK! but mostly FOOZLE!
    Of course these are the Thorpe kids, Hence the uncanny Ransom/Gil resemblance. I can’t believe I didn’t pick it. The literary awesomeness of this strip just continues to astound,

    Welcome back kids. A few weeks to rehab then its all of to the Milford country club for the summer story.

    Comment by Salinger — January 5, 2012 @ 4:05 am

  9. Remember, kids: there’s no better way to assert your individuality than by getting the same tattoo as all your friends!!

    Comment by jules — January 5, 2012 @ 5:50 pm

  10. Looks like Kaz’s last good moment was making fun of JamJar by calling himself “the Kaz”. We may as well start calling him Bob or Robert or something if he’s gonna act like this.

    We’ve long known of Milford post-game hangouts, The Bucket, PUB, etc.
    Is TOWEL the new pre-game hangout for Mudlark players and coaches?

    Comment by billytheskink — January 5, 2012 @ 11:02 pm

  11. I think we’ve gone straight past Robert to “Mr. Kaz(whateverKazisshortfor).”

    Comment by jules — January 6, 2012 @ 9:03 am

  12. I think we’ve gone straight to Mr. Rogers.

    Comment by Knoxy — January 6, 2012 @ 9:31 am

  13. Hey tat slaps ! wtf?

    Comment by Gil'sBarber — January 6, 2012 @ 6:13 pm

  14. […] know Kaz is on record as regretting getting his tat, but if it has the power to migrate from one arm to the other, it must be pretty special. Maybe that’s why he hasn’t had it removed. Not […]

    Pingback by Come for the Gun Show, Stay for the Hypotheticals | This Week in Milford — March 11, 2017 @ 12:02 pm

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