This Week in Milford

March 31, 2013

I Like Her Better When She Walks Away

Filed under: Milford Idiots, Prairie Style Windows — nedryerson @ 8:25 pm


Oh Knox Foley, you think you are a special snowflake asshole, but your type is a dime a dozen ’round this tank town. Future lawyer, future victim of a soap party. We’ve heard this act before.

Ned here, breaking down the fourth wall for a sec. I’ve never played on a competitive sports team. I avoided all activity in phys ed and sweated through one hot ass Florida summer so I wouldn’t take any of this crap during high school. I’m sure being on a sports team probably exposes you to a wider variety of weirdos than the clan of bookish types I ran with. I don’t discount what it means to compete and pull together, but I’m continually annoyed by how these iconoclastic assholes spout some goofball mumbo jumbo and disrupt the mission of the team. Isn’t there supposed to be some leadership, some peer review? Yo, check that shit at the door asshole and play the game! Don’t bro me if you don’t know me.


…or you could send Dinny to do the job. Yeah, you’re like the legal system, twenty pounds of shit in a ten pound bag.

Hey all, thanks for listening to me gripe. Thanks for hanging around for this, even though it’s mostly me complaining.  Hey, it isn’t all bad. The last panel reminded me of Alejandro Escovedo’s Castanets:



  1. Wow! Twenty pounds of snark in a ten-pound bag, with a soundtrack to boot! Entries like this are what keep bringing me here.

    Comment by Moon Mullins — March 31, 2013 @ 8:58 pm

  2. Peer review Milford? That is like coaching at Milford – nonexistent!

    Ned, team players are normally only this asswipe-ish when they are going out with bitchy cheerleaders, which none of these guys is doing. When was the last time a Milford protagonist went out with a cheerleader by the way? Winrhub – more cheerleaders and less boy-girl team imbreeding!

    Comment by Milfordian — March 31, 2013 @ 10:12 pm

  3. You’d think this kind of behavior would cause the coach to step in and — eh, I forgot, I’m talkin’ Gil Thorp here. Providing guidance to pliable young men would cut into his heavy schedule of drinkin’, golfin’, and bonkin’ Mimi.

    Comment by John Walters (@johnswalters) — April 1, 2013 @ 4:19 am

  4. One line drive to this uberdouche’s brain housing group and we can move on……….

    Comment by Knoxy — April 1, 2013 @ 5:43 am

  5. Ric: “Who’s on first?”
    Knox: “The runner.”
    Ric: “And lawyers wonder why no one likes them…”

    To answer Milfordian’s question, the last athlete-cheerleader couple I can recall was straight-arrow Sean Pettibone and Lexi Conroy in fall 2005. Of course, Lexi dumped Pettibone because narcissism and he started dating athlete Kenya Beale. Kenya was a cheerleader during football season though.

    There’s also the case of Matt (Rogers) the Hatt’s cheerleader act at the volleyball game back in 2008, that led to him getting dumped by girlfriend Stacie Hiller.

    Comment by billytheskink — April 1, 2013 @ 7:09 am

  6. Did Micah Huang graduate?

    Comment by Dood — April 1, 2013 @ 7:25 am

  7. How many obnoxious dicks can one hick town possible have. Each sports season seems to produce a new one.

    Comment by Bobby Joe — April 1, 2013 @ 8:36 am

  8. I’m confused — don’t you hit and run when there’s a runner on first base? In fact, isn’t that the only time you hit and run? What is Ric’s problem with that strategy?

    Comment by Scott P. — April 1, 2013 @ 11:55 am

  9. You often do hit and run with a runner on first, but Knox is talking about a “run and hit,” where the steal sign is on and the batter puts the ball in play just inside first, behind the runner. The only problem with Knox saying this is that it’s not his call– it’s one for the manager or coach. But since he is this season’s self-important dickhead, this comes with the territory.

    Comment by vaganova — April 1, 2013 @ 2:57 pm

  10. Also, awesome song. I was wondering if that was what the title of this post was referencing, then I thought, “nah, me and Alejandro’s mom are the only two people who know that song”, then lo and behold!

    Seriously, ya’ll, click on the link if you’re not normally inclined to.

    Comment by The Mighty Untrained FOOZLE — April 1, 2013 @ 4:06 pm

  11. Agreed regarding Escovedo. I’ve had the chance to interview him a couple of times over the years and he’s never anything but a classy, fun and laid-back guy. And has a hell of a great story about his first concert. Check it out if you wish. Here’s the unedited version –

    Comment by J. Neas — April 2, 2013 @ 12:39 pm

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