This Week in Milford

July 16, 2014

Don’t Really Want To Think About Gil’s Two Part Package

Filed under: Boredom in Milford, Coach Kaz, Gil Thorp, golf — timbuys @ 4:41 am

July 16,2014


Today we learn that, yes, the Standishes are indeed terrible awful people who have come to the conclusion that if others are to benefit from True’s talent and effort, then they might as well get some tangible rewards as well. Or, just as likely, we learn that while Gil may be drunk six ways to Sunday all Summer, he can smell a grifter from a mile away and is holding off on offering these two anything based solely upon Art’s word that his kid is highly rated on the ‘coast’. Notice that Standish pere never specified which coast he meant. Sure, could be the East Coast, maybe the West Coast, of heck even the Gulf Coast. For all the context we’ve been given it could just be the coast of Lake Erie or the Cote d’Ivoire.

Bonus points: Hey, gratuitous golf scene! I’m sure the golfers in the audience will know exactly what that, to me, mysterious implement Gil is wielding in panel three is, so no Pantheon for it.

Also, after having to contemplate Gil’s package, aren’t we all glad we only had to get a profile shot of him bending over in his tight, tight shorts?



  1. Gil, I think Bert wants his saddle shoes back.

    Comment by billytheskink — July 16, 2014 @ 6:36 am

  2. That certainly doesn’t look like a Big Bertha. Gil likes to do the 19th hole first so he probably doesn’t know what he’s wielding . It looks like Gil stole one if those candle lit things from somebody’s patio.

    Comment by Jive turkey — July 16, 2014 @ 10:33 am

  3. Actually, I think the mysterious object in p3 probably DOES qualify for the Pantheon. Never saw a wood look like that from any angle, and it’s too small to be a hole-cutter and for that matter Jt’s suggestion, a tiki torch.

    It does appear we are stuck with these delusional Standishes, at least for the summer. No Herk the Mauler…

    Comment by vaganova — July 16, 2014 @ 1:09 pm

  4. What say you other golfers? Is that something someone might actually carry onto a golf course? I kinda thought it might be a hole-cutter so that’s why I didn’t enshrine it in the pantheon. As to Jt’s suggestion, I’ll have to check with the loss prevention manager at Schultz’s Polynesian to see if any of the torches have been reported missing.

    Comment by timbuys — July 16, 2014 @ 3:24 pm

  5. Upon reviewing the strip I noticed Gil is driving the cart. I’ve never heard of anyone getting a DUI on the golf course but give Gil time. The golf pro needs to have a special cart for Gil with a breathalyzer on it.

    Comment by Jive turkey — July 16, 2014 @ 5:16 pm

  6. I want to ask why Gil would take a tiki torch from Schulz’s Polynesian onto the golf course, but silly me, I forget he has a quart of vodka in him and that such a fourteenth club could make perfect sense– he may need it as a reminder of where he has promised to take Mimi for that special dinner. But if that were the case he could have left it in the car to remind him later. He may be using it to putt, the way Jackie Gleason used to lie down and use his putter handle like a pool cue.

    Comment by vaganova — July 16, 2014 @ 5:20 pm

  7. Gil wants no part of a quarterback who might raise expectations for the perpetually underperforming Mudlark “program.” With a good QB, Gil might actually have to work on the playbook.

    Comment by John S. Walters — July 17, 2014 @ 1:15 pm

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