This Week in Milford

October 14, 2014

Why Did The Armadillo Walk To The Middle Of The Road?

Filed under: Bad Jokes, Boredom in Milford, Coach Kaz, Gil Thorp — timbuys @ 7:39 am

October 14, 2014


Well, I mentioned in comments that I would actually have a decent amount of time today to write a post. Fortunately for me, I didn’t promise that the additional time would lead to a high quality post…

In panel one, we see Kaz (and Gil) illuminated while the disembodied legs in the foreground remain shrouded in darkness. This is a very interesting tableau: I’m not sure what the thought process was that led to framing the coaches like this, but it does… something. Yep, it sure does something.

It seems to me, based on the change in background, that we skipped ahead about five minutes or so from the beginning of Gil’s rendition of that beloved chestnut about the middle of the road. Fortunately, we come in right as he drops the kicker: Yellow Stripes and Dead Armadillos. Yessir, I do believe Gil might have taken that line directly from the b-side of Slim Chance and the Long Shots‘ first single.

Panel three is a jaw dropper in its own right: The insight and analysis on display here is so deep you couldn’t drown a flea in it. I do like how Coach Shaw – Hey, there guy! We haven’t seen you in a while – is just staring at Steve, probably giving him the stinkeye as his indignation at being leapfrogged by this one-armed moron in the Milford athletic department has him seriously questioning his life choices.

Given the copious amount of time to compose this post that I have, I would be remiss not to include a youtube clip as a soundtrack to listen to while reading this post. One of my earlier drafts of this post was going to include a joke based on p2 about not accepting offers to go to lunch with Gil because of how said lunch would include roadkill armadillo. Well, I couldn’t quite make that one match the unparalleled hilarity of the rest of my commentary but I am glad to see whoever wrote this song went to the same place.



  1. Or, as the famous country song says,

    “There’s a dead skunk in the middle of the road, stinking the highway up!”

    This storyline is starting to stink, Whigrub. More focus on football and building a winning team would be appreciated!

    Comment by Milfordian — October 14, 2014 @ 8:52 am

  2. Can we just skip ahead to the mid-December denouement? Milford barely misses the playdowns but somebody learns a valuable life lesson with little or no input from Gil. Am I right?

    Comment by John S. Walters — October 14, 2014 @ 9:43 am

  3. Man the pacing in this strip drives me nuts.

    9/29 – 10/8 (9 strips): Shaw game.
    10/9: Shaw game postmortem.
    10/10: Gil says “Competition is Good.”
    10/11: A week passes, Jefferson game (1 strip).
    10/12: No strip.
    10/13: “Competitors” parents complain.
    10/14: Gil: “We need to decide on a quarterback (so I can reduce the complaints by half).”

    So the “competition” lasts all of one game and we have no idea from the one strip that features the game how the competitors fared relative to each other. There had better be some damn good exposition coming up pronto.

    Comment by teenchy — October 14, 2014 @ 9:47 am

  4. I want to know what’s happened to Trainer Rick Scott. I see the other worthies, but the guy who can tell Gil which players can walk straight after the previous game and which ones can count backward from 100 ought to be there too.

    I guess the timing is right for a decision, and certainly the infighting will now escalate– False Standish, Adolf’s mother, and the locker room in turmoil with Adolf trying to suborn his teammates. But Gil did say it when True asked him what he could expect if he chose Mfnrd– “A chance to compete for the position.” I say they will play one more game first, and probably tell the two players it’s decisive, just to pressurize them into throwing interceptions so Mfnrd loses the game and is guaranteed no better than 2nd in the Valley Conference.

    Comment by vaganova — October 14, 2014 @ 1:52 pm

  5. The armadillo quote is from Jim Hightower, who somehow got elected Texas Commissioner of Agriculture without being owned by Cargill.

    Comment by Downpuppy (@Downpuppy) — October 14, 2014 @ 4:45 pm

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