This Week in Milford

December 7, 2015

Gil Torino


It’s Monday and Milford’s punter gets a whole panel to showcase some football action. That should be enough for a while.

Another day, another quizzical production scenario for Welcome Back Carter. Alan Mayne is on location and the show is about high school football now. Viewers have forgotten all about Holly Dobbs/ Carter B. Carter and now they are hooked on the exploits of Dingbat Darwin, social media dimwit…

not if Gil Thorp has anything to say about it! Something is exploding in his face…ears, cranium, eyeballs, whatever.




  1. After that one lucky night at Scioto Downs Racino, Gil did a little D.I.Y. and inked 7 7 7 on his knuckles. (He worked with a mirror and kinda messed it up…)

    Bittmayne’s all confused: notwithstanding Gil’s proto-antlers, and ignoring the menacing helmets, “Geez, Gil, WTF on the knuckles?”

    Comment by g2design — December 7, 2015 @ 8:33 am

  2. Is there a beat down coming? Hope so. That would be an appropriate ending to this absurd arc.

    Comment by Bobby Joe — December 7, 2015 @ 9:12 am

  3. Forget about sulking Dory — Alan’s about to get some red-hot Angry Coach action on tape. An Angry Coach who, by the way, is proving Marty Moon’s point: his teams can’t handle adversity.

    Comment by John S. Walters — December 7, 2015 @ 9:37 am

  4. So it’s more than two weeks since Dory skipped practice … and still no one has told Gil why? Is someone going to tell him in the middle of the third quarter?
    Oh, and by the way, good to see you back, Gil.

    Comment by Philip — December 7, 2015 @ 10:53 am

  5. In trying to bring this back to football: it seems that Jarodd Hale is really terrible. I mean, not that we would have any conclusive way to know with what little we’ve seen on the field, but surely Doofus Dory can’t have been that much of a linchpin for the whole team.

    Comment by timbuys — December 7, 2015 @ 5:45 pm

  6. Everyone – tomorrow go outside and punt a football. Your left arm (or right if you kick lefty) will be nowhere near where Milfords punters is. No wonder the team sucks – they cant even punt correctly.

    Comment by robmize2013 — December 7, 2015 @ 9:15 pm

  7. Damn, robmize is right. As a dancer, I am accustomed to arms and legs opposing one another (“It’s like walking.”) But if you do this punting (I tried it with a pair of rolled up wool socks) you will shank right every time. So punters actually move like the Phil Collins “I Can’t Dance” video…

    Comment by vaganova — December 8, 2015 @ 12:19 am

  8. In truth, I am glad to see Gil express ownership via “Get off my sideline!” It reminds me of Patrick Stewart as Jean-Luc PIcard ordering the wonderful John de Lancie, as his occasional nemesis “Q,” to “Get off my bridge!”

    Comment by vaganova — December 8, 2015 @ 3:53 pm

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