This Week in Milford

February 10, 2016

Rookie Love

Filed under: Just plain sad, Kenzie Hanley, Milford Idiots, sucking face — timbuys @ 8:58 am


Maxwell, buddy, I’m no expert in affairs of the heart, but complaining about the weather when the lady asked to go for a walk outside ain’t gonna get it done. To say the least, Kenzie’s grading you on a very generous curve.

Hey, just so I don’t come off as totally negative, you should take her to Milford’s greatest hot spot, Schultz’s Polynesian Garden, where we know some folks have, ahem, gotten lucky.

Not for the first time I don’t think, but here’s today’s musical inspiration.



  1. “Really? Burger and fries at The Bucket and you’ll put out? Wow!!!”

    Comment by John S. Walters — February 10, 2016 @ 9:43 am

  2. Are the boys and girls basketball teams in the trees throwing confetti in celebration of this event ?

    Comment by Jive Turkey — February 10, 2016 @ 12:30 pm

  3. I can’t be sure of this, but I have heard from a fellow member of the Fraternal Order of Raccoons that Schultz’s Polynesian Garden is offering Neapolitan Knockwurst and FOUR kinds of pizza…

    Comment by vaganova — February 10, 2016 @ 12:31 pm

  4. Stacy ordered the Knockwurst in Fast Times at Ridgemont High. Who will play the part of Damone and steal Max’s date? True ? Gil?

    Comment by Jive Turkey — February 10, 2016 @ 1:22 pm

  5. Let’s see– Schultz’s was the place where the accident-prone Lucky met his dream girl, when she spilled a pitcher of soda over his head, right? As I remember, he completely mishandled that relationship and she dumped him. “Amy, Amy Lange?” Utility infielder whom Lucky thought was his satellite instead of his equal?

    Comment by vaganova — February 10, 2016 @ 2:40 pm

  6. So, dinner gets him safely to first base. With a good jump he can probably swipe second standing up. But, if he so much as leans toward third base, he’s out by a mile. Girl’s no plaything, nowadimsayin?

    I know this deserved a basketball analogy, but pitchers and catchers report in less than two weeks. Can we wrap up this puppy love thing by then? Please?

    Comment by g2design — February 10, 2016 @ 8:17 pm

  7. G2 is right about timing, but Mfnrd is on a different calendar. Basketball (assuming we see any) will go into April, and baseball into July. Plenty of time for Maxwell and Kenzie to become acquainted.

    Comment by vaganova — February 10, 2016 @ 8:22 pm

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