This Week in Milford

October 8, 2016

Far Hipsters


The technique of aiming for the runner’s far hip with a handoff is widely accepted; hey, if it was good enough for Bud Wilkinson it’s good enough for me.  I expect that Heather Burns can read as well as any Milfordian (especially since all those little free libraries have been springing up around town) but I expect even more some sort of backstory/exposition about her quarterback coaching skills, and sooner* than later.

Those exploding fingers on The Secret Pelwecki’s near hip: sign of a romantic spark or something Rick Scott will have to tape up and splint on Monday? On that note, musical inspiration for today:

metapost: If you are or have been in the path of Hurricane Matthew, give us a shout out and let us know you’re okay. You’ll recall from my Christmas 2015 metapost that I’ve spent some time in Charleston and have friends and family there and so have spent the bulk of the day trying to keep tabs on them. I’ve not heard from Mr. Bakst, although he was rumored to have been last seen with The Gray Man of Pawley’s Island.

*See what I did there?


  1. I posted this on yesterday’s strip before I realized today’s was up.

    I know I’m in the minority here, but I think that in the Thorpiverse, this plot makes perfect sense. Lunky lineman wants desperately to be a quarterback (“You gotta be a foot-ball he-ro!” etc) and a girl with thus far unexplained expertise offers to help him. I suspect her Monmouth father probably did play the position, and that she soaked up her son-less father’s every word. She is tired of being an “also played” on the soccer team, and sees a chance to accomplish something in a field she has knowledge of. The paid coaches are trying to win games, and taking weeks to teach a Kevin Palooka how to play a new position makes no sense whatever. As far as field availability is concerned, I worked in high schools for almost forty years, and only after I retired did I see anyone use the football field on a Saturday morning. They’re too narrow for real soccer and the youth and age group football teams only began renting school fields after good artificial turf came in less than fifteen years ago. So, not to be a dickhead, I’ll say it again– so far this story makes sense to me. Incidentally, there is precedent in GT for cross-gender sports expertise. Lini Verde, the three point whiz of a few years ago, learned basketball from his mother, who had played professionally in Italy.

    Comment by vaganova — October 8, 2016 @ 1:58 pm

  2. Gil and Kaz had this great plan to keep Pelwecki firmly entrenched on the defensive line (the plan basically amounted to “humiliate Kevin in front of the whole team”). Now, Heather is ruining it. Looking forward to Gil tearing Heather a new one.

    Comment by John S. Walters — October 8, 2016 @ 2:21 pm

  3. The recent earthquake in Milford has extended to the football field, not to mention the running track which is fixated at an angle that only a Hot Wheels midgie or Terry Labonte could cleanly negotiate. Coming from a track family(me, my uncle, my grandfather, my nephew), simply put an extra steel spike or two in the cleat for extra traction, no problem. As for the football field, if Moose is at the pre-game at the 50-yard line for the coin flip, Gil and Kaz better instruct him to defer to the side slanting down for the 2nd half. It might pose a problem if Moose is scrambling(assuming Gil gives him a shot) and trying to run uphill. Screen passes and buttonhole patterns could be problems for the receivers, further confusing the issue for Moose. Talk about rally-killers.
    P3: The Batman Kapow!! Technique to drive home the point. Works every time.

    Comment by T. Drew Hardin — October 8, 2016 @ 3:27 pm

  4. BUTTONHOOK, not buttonhole.

    Comment by T. Drew Hardin — October 8, 2016 @ 3:33 pm

  5. I am glad that T Drew mentions the recent earthquake. We tend to think of Mfnrd as “undifferentiated midwest,” but clearly the place is seismically active. Consider the baseball and softball diamonds, which involve angles distorted by thrust faults, and wire fences so close to the foul lines that a runner could hardly stay in the basepath without snagging his uniform.

    Comment by vaganova — October 8, 2016 @ 5:42 pm

  6. Let us, for the moment, put aside the question of where Heather learned handoff drills. Where did she, or anyone else under age 50, learn the term “breadbasket”?

    Comment by Philip — October 9, 2016 @ 5:07 am

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