This Week in Milford

April 6, 2017

Southpaw Ex Machina


“He’s poised, he’s been well coached, he throws hard.  You can tell he’s not from Milford.”

Just as with True Standish in 2014-15, Gil’s chestnuts will be pulled from the proverbial fire by a transfer student. No need to develop this guy as a player or as a character.

But just how impressive is he?  Sure you’re gonna make the catcher’s mitt vap pop (vape? I thought Milford High was a no-smoking campus) if you’re throwing from 20 feet away.   Back up to a regulation distance and let’s hear what happens.

As for his name, when I saw it first it made me think of two 1930s-era pitchers, Johnny “Double No-Hit” Vander Meer and Elden Auker, but he appears to be in sales or engineering.  So how does Pete de Windt know him?  Maybe they ran into each other at the Tulip Time Festival.  Wonder if they know the DeGroots



  1. Vap!

    Comment by Dood — April 6, 2017 @ 5:47 am

  2. Nice to see Steady Pete deWindt finally get a line. I don’t think Tight End & Shortstop tend to go together, but hey, this is Mfnrd.

    Comment by Downpuppy (@Downpuppy) — April 6, 2017 @ 6:29 am

  3. Downpuppy, Kevin Pelwecki filled in at infield last year (second base, I think), and was an interior lineman and linebacker in football. Yeah, it’s Mfnrd.
    Is this the first time Whigham has actually drawn Pete DeWindt? Normally, we only know his name because Marty calls it, or Gil tells Marjie which position he’s playing.

    Comment by Philip — April 6, 2017 @ 7:31 am

  4. Call me a fool and I wouldn’t blame you if you did, but I think this baseball plot maybe entertaining . Not softball.

    Comment by Jive Turkey — April 6, 2017 @ 7:31 am

  5. teenchy,
    WE ARE…etc., etc., etc.,
    Jane and her son are convinced, Whoville is saved, and Horton is spared the Beezle-Nut oil bath. I can put my conscience to bed while I dig into my Breakfast Quesadilla Bacon Combo(love my coffee black) that I got from the Drive-Thru at Taco Bell.

    Comment by T. Drew Hardin — April 6, 2017 @ 7:40 am

  6. The adventures of the Milford High School Dutch Student Association? I’m willing to see where this might go.

    Comment by billytheskink — April 6, 2017 @ 8:14 am

  7. Pete showed up for the crushing block that unleashed the Heater –

    Comment by Downpuppy (@Downpuppy) — April 6, 2017 @ 8:54 am

  8. “Shortstop Pete de Windt”? What happened to the little jerk whose father drunk-drove Boo Radley to the shore of the River Styx? Just vanished into the ether?

    Comment by John S. Walters — April 6, 2017 @ 10:18 am

  9. That was young Master Bader. He was a second baseman I believe.

    Curious if he will be back. Universally hated by his teamates. Might have fled Milford.

    Comment by Bobby Joe — April 6, 2017 @ 10:59 am

  10. Barry Bader was a second baseman, as Bobby Joe points out. De Windt was the shortstop last year as well. Last year’s lineup:

    C – Mike Granger
    1B – Geoff Larkin
    2B – Barry Bader/Larry Arroyo/Kevin Pelwecki
    3B – Ken Brown
    SS – Pete De Windt
    OF – Collin Lalonde/Ron Hall
    OF – Max Ortiz
    OF – Bobby Mitchell/Ron Hall

    SP – Collin Lalonde
    SP – Hakeem Archer
    SP – Bobby Mitchell
    RP – True Standish

    We know that De Windt is returning as he has already appeared. We know True Standish is gone for sure. Granger, Brown, Mitchell, Ortiz, Archer, and Pelwecki all appeared in other sports earlier this academic year. Bader was probably not a senior last year as he bragged about beating out a senior for the starting job at 2B, but could certainly have skipped town after his dad went to the clink. Lalonde has appeared in the last two baseball seasons, so he could be back, but also may have graduated. Hall, Larkin, and Arroyo all made their first appearances last season, so they could all conceivably be back. Arroyo was the backup to Bader at 2B, so he may have been the senior Bader mentions beating out.

    My expectation? A pretty similar lineup to last year’s, Gil does say they’ve returned a bunch of lettermen after all. I’ve graduated Lalonde to free up a spot for Ron Hall.

    C – Mike Granger
    1B – Geoff Larkin
    2B – Kevin Pelwecki (Bader will probably be back, but I don’t want to accept that)
    3B – Ken Brown
    SS – Pete De Windt
    OF – Ron Hall
    OF – Max Ortiz
    OF – Bobby Mitchell

    SP – Ryan Van Auken
    SP – Hakeem Archer
    SP – Bobby Mitchell

    Comment by billytheskink — April 6, 2017 @ 12:00 pm

  11. I would love to see The Secret Pelwecki practicing his fullback skillz at 2B!

    Comment by Downpuppy (@Downpuppy) — April 6, 2017 @ 1:08 pm

  12. I’m wondering if Master Bader will return, and if he does, if he will have settled down or if he will still be the Class Asshole. Misfortune can sometimes promote growth, but in Mfnrd, disappearance is more common.

    Comment by vaganova's scorekeeper — April 6, 2017 @ 1:28 pm

  13. “Did you notice that he throws hard? And is left-handed?” — This is the hardcore cutting-edge coaching analysis that has won Gil infinite state titles and what keeps me coming back… Gil+Kaz are going to put the luddites at SABR and BaseballProspectus out of business!

    Comment by Hitorque — April 6, 2017 @ 1:39 pm

  14. @vaganova’s scorekeeper: Bader was at least as good a person as his shitstain teammates who didn’t have any moral high ground to stand on themselves… But it will be humorous to see yet another locker room torn apart by fighting and distrust and Gil doing jack fucking shit about it until the last week of the season…

    @billytheskink: Just your daily reminder that True Standish was a Top 5 QB nationwide and he chose to go to Wake (LOL) Forest mainly because it has a pretty campus… I’m also pretty sure that after pounding drunken sorority partygirl snatch for a year he’s forgotten that Boo ever existed…

    Comment by Hitorque — April 6, 2017 @ 1:46 pm

  15. $10 says that Van Auken knows Tinaa Aagaard from rehaab,

    Comment by jackson008 — April 6, 2017 @ 5:15 pm

  16. Today’s headline from the Milford Enquirer

    “Documents From Notarized Receipts Show Coach Shaw Running Up A Tab At The New Thayer Hilton!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
    Sub headline
    “Expenditures Included Unauthorized Phone Calls, Reportedly To Psychic Lines, Excessive Culinary Allowances(i. e., Caviar, Brie, Mosel Wine, et al), Escort Services, Limo Trips to Coaching Seminars, and Abuse Of Racquetball Privileges. An Audit, Though Not Finalized, Revealed A Roughly $728/Day Lifestyle.”

    Comment by T. Drew Hardin — April 6, 2017 @ 6:02 pm

  17. Way to VAP it in there, Show Stopper!

    Comment by nedryerson — April 7, 2017 @ 9:01 am

  18. […] the most clueless kid at Milford High.”  Where was Pelwecki last year when The Hurricane blew in from Kingsbrook and the girls from Central showed up with signs? We know they were on the field […]

    Pingback by I Missed the Sign | This Week in Milford — June 16, 2018 @ 8:26 pm

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