This Week in Milford

June 6, 2017

Misadventures In Plot Advancement


Man, our bespectacled Dafne summoner is about as useful as Rubin when it comes to advancing the plot. At least we got a score. Do you suppose any of the kids on the Central team know what’s going on?

Bonus point: As pointed out in the comments, it is awesome that the Valley Conference is old school and uses wooden bats.



  1. Not sure how I feel about “KRAK!” as a bat sound rather than “CRACK!” If you’re going to do KRAK (don’t do crack!) why not just make it “KRUK!” in honor of the hefty former MLB player who once told a woman, “Lady, I’m not an athlete. I’m a professional baseball player.”

    Comment by J.D. Springer — June 6, 2017 @ 8:41 am

  2. Two questions:

    1. Didn’t the Trumpet have a reporter covering the game?

    2. Why did Ryan change into a marching band uniform?

    Comment by John S. Walters — June 6, 2017 @ 8:41 am

  3. RE: KRAK!

    Mfnrd must be in the only non-professional league in the world to use wooden bats. I remark this because for me, the insipid “ping” of a metal bat reminds me of the other things which are ruining baseball. We have an AA team in my town, but as much as I love baseball, I rarely go. The outsized digital scoreboard constantly runs silly images, and worst of all, there is an incessant wall of noise from the PA, as if the stadium management believes the crowd is there for a rock concert instead of a more leisurely ballgame. It’s hard to believe the players can hear themselves think. I’m dating myself, but there are supposed to be quiet stretches, ended by the explosive crack of a hard line drive and the roar from the crowd.

    Comment by vaganova — June 6, 2017 @ 11:52 am

  4. Here, Here! Or is it Hear, Hear! Vaganova. MLB is trying to speed up baseball and doing the wrong things for the wrong people. They do this to appeal to the masses I guess , and maybe the young masses. They are concerned with them leaving the game early so they want to speed up the game. It doesn’t matter. They’ll show up late and leave early whether it’s a 4 hour game or 2 hour game. White Sox played over a 4 hour game vs Tigers on Sunday. Imagine how long the game would’ve been had the Sox been forced to throw 4 pitches in that intentional walk to JD Martinez!

    Comment by Jive Turkey — June 6, 2017 @ 5:29 pm

  5. Nobody will talk about the principal reason for overlong MLB games– stoppages to allow time for TV commercials. It has nothing to do with requiring four pitches for a walk or setting a countdown clock for getting into the box or delivering a pitch. Games take more than 50% more time to complete than they did in 1950, and the only significant change is the insertion of incessant commercial breaks. Soccer, to its credit, has refused to allow this, and has instead relegated advertising to stadium placards or on screen PIP boxes.

    Comment by vaganova — June 6, 2017 @ 6:21 pm

  6. Commercials are a big reason but I’m fine with that . That’s not going to change. There were less pitching changes in those days too. Starters often went 9. Probably less mound visits too though I have no proof. The length of the game doesn’t bother me most of the time. I could do without the pitching changes which usually occur in the 6,7,8 and 9th. I don’t remember who it was, maybe Peter Gammons or someone of that ilk. But earlier this year they said don’t have pitchers warm up in bullpen. Give them as many as they need once they get in game. Then you wouldn’t have catcher meeting at mound or pitching coach out there stalling. Pitchers get what, 9 or 10 warm ups when the enter game anyway . What do they need 20? 30?. I think this would save their arms too as sometimes a reliever gets up 2 or 3 times a game to warm up. I know the Sox have had multiple relievers on DL past few years. Maybe Partially because of excessive warming up. Just a theory. But Nate Jones, Jake Petricka and Zach Putman have been on that list 2 years in a row.

    Comment by Jive Turkey — June 6, 2017 @ 6:53 pm

  7. P3 must have shown up in the German version of Gil Thorp, nestled in page 23 in the right-hand corner of the want-ad section of Die Welt. The newspaper itself took the cue from the sound effects of Kraftwerk(“Wir fahr’n, fahr’n, fahr’n auf der Autobahn-KRAK!!!!!!”). Later on, I’ll be fanning through El Mundo and Pravda to see how KRAK translates to Spanish and Russian, respectively. I’ve always wanted to find out what KRAK looks like in the Cyrillic alphabet.

    Comment by T. Drew Hardin — June 12, 2017 @ 8:57 pm

  8. God, John S., that’s a Sergeant Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band original, if I ever saw one. On the 50th anniversary of the album, how apropos. Just in time to make his mark for the Deluxe Edition.

    Comment by T. Drew Hardin — June 12, 2017 @ 9:02 pm

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