This Week in Milford

August 11, 2017

And I’m gonna beat Heather like a drum

Filed under: football — robmize2013 @ 6:20 pm

Man, the arrogance – first Heather  applauds Kevin for beating a ‘veteran’ DB – who is probably in his first summer camp anyway and who isnt even shaving every day. Real veterans are pros who’ve been toiling in NFL camps for years. Big freakin deal.

Then she has the nerve to pat him on the rump – so hard it registers on the strip as a white flash – has she really earned the right to do that yet? And where’s her whistle? Methinks Kevo is wondering how hard this gig is if a teenage girl is coaching him, rather then a grizzled old man with a pot belly. Girls like her are strictly trainers or equipment managers.

Finally our dynamic duo is back observing the whole thing and even Case has had enough of Miss Army Sergeant and he’s not even practicing! But if he got his wish, who knows what regimen she’d be prescribing for him. ” OK, lets do 50 laps around the court, and for every missed free throw after practice, you shoot 20 more.”

Good thing this summer plot cant last too long, because we have found yet another insufferable character to latch onto until the bonfire.



  1. Do you wish she was a basketball coach? Yeah, I guess she really shows up those pretender “coaches” at UVA and the NBA.
    Just end this now.

    Comment by Philip — August 11, 2017 @ 6:44 pm

  2. I’m just gonna pretend the butt-pat didn’t happen and discuss the most ridiculous thing about today’s strip: Jaquan in a hoodie.

    First, he’s been swanning around Milford for WEEKS now, and he’s been pestered by fame-whores exactly once. So why does he need a disguise to go to a 7-on-7 summer football game that has precisely zero spectators?

    Second, and more importantly, a big rangy black guy choosing to wear a hoodie for a disguise? In a predominantly white community, that’s a great way to get shot by a nervous cop.

    Comment by John S. Walters — August 12, 2017 @ 6:57 am

  3. Really, I just meant the Maxwell Smart reference as a joke the other day but P3 is just begging for an Agent 86 analogy

    “That’s right, chief(as Agent 86 is talking to his right sneaker), we have the girl in our sight and she doesn’t suspect a thing.”
    “Good. KAOS was attempting to throw us for a loop by using a girl to coach the team. The real coaches are up in the bleachers.”
    “I see them now, Chief. Do you want me to make a move so we can get their playbook?”
    “No, no, don’t blow your cover. Hymie is disguised as one of the water boys and may be able to swipe the classified info while trying to explain a draw play to the players. If you see anything suspicious, call me immediately.”
    “Right, Chief. By the way, does this hoodie have a vent? I’m sweating like a pig.”
    “NO, Agent 86!!!!!!! It was the best I could do from the CONTROL warehouse. Just grin and bear it!!!!!!!!”
    “Right, Chief(the sneaker won’t turn off so Smart bangs on the concession stand to see if that will work. Agent 99 comes to the rescue and deftly turns the switch). Thanks, Agent 99. I like that semi-coon skin cap you have on your head. I swear, you look like a very sexy Fess Parker disguised as Daniel Boone.”
    (Agent 99 giggling)”Ooohhhhh-ohhh, Max”

    Comment by T. Drew Hardin — August 15, 2017 @ 11:31 am

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