This Week in Milford

February 12, 2018

Marty Moon: Schmuck For A Lifetime

Filed under: Marty Moon — nedryerson @ 6:58 am


On this particular Monday morning, I’m feeling very blessed. My assignment today is to riff on pure Marty Moon ego driven delusion. We are all bracing for the showdown over cultural sensitivity among other dicey issues that came up last week, but for now, it’s just good ol’ Marty puffing out his chest. This is the glorious moment of anticipation before his balloon gets popped (which is often anticlimactic, overly drawn out or otherwise bungled in execution).

Speaking of Marty’s ego, it does appear that WDIG isn’t helping matters by giving Marty his own spacious office with a fancy desk. One wonders what kind of business WDIG is doing to have such lavish offices. Maybe this is just more of Marty’s rich fantasy life, although if the appointment with the students is a real thing, it wouldn’t be advisable for them to meet Marty down in the basement of his mother’s house. That’s a different movie entirely.

Yes, we love the riff about Marty in the basement pretending to be a powerful media mogul:



  1. So am I to understand that not one person called the station to lodge a complaint? That’s Marty’s genteel racism was completely unnoticed by his producer and station manager??

    How fucked up is this place called Milford?

    Comment by hitorque — February 12, 2018 @ 8:13 am

  2. In real radio stations, only the salespeople and management have offices. The on-air “talent” has maybe a desk and a broken chair.

    Also, “Studio One” would likely be The One Studio.

    Comment by John S. Walters — February 12, 2018 @ 8:25 am

  3. Also, I’m not the lyricist in the group, but “Schmuck for a Lifetime” is a perfect fit for Talking Heads’ “Once in a Lifetime.”

    “And you may find yourself calling high school sports in a packing crate,
    And you may find yourself stuck in a tank town radio station,
    And you may find yourself blind drunk behind a dumpster,
    And you may ask yourself, well, how did I get here?

    “Letting the days go by, let the bourbon wash me down
    Letting the days go by, reaching an audience of one (Hi Mom)
    Into the blue again, all my dreams are dead
    Schmuck for a lifetime, my life is nothingness.”

    Comment by John S. Walters — February 12, 2018 @ 8:33 am

  4. Moon is supposed to be a caricature, but sadly seems to so much like the real life pompous sports radio shock jocks. We have one locally who has been fired by several stations both here and in other markets, and yet he continues to find someone who will rehire him every time he gets himself in trouble (trouble that includes racially-charged language, even).

    In any event, it was asked a few days ago how long it has been since Moon was truly a villain, or major player at all, in this strip. I think his last significant role was in the Matt Rogers/Jeff Ponczak story line where those two replaced him as the host of the Prep Spotlight TV show, which was close to a decade ago. I like that he’s a character again, if he’s just going to call games from time-to-time, then he may as well be Paul Strange.

    Comment by billytheskink — February 12, 2018 @ 8:46 am

  5. Bravo, John S. Walters!

    Comment by nedryerson — February 12, 2018 @ 9:36 am

  6. Marty fancies himself another Howard Stern? Since when has he been in other media besides radio? I’ll hang up and listen…

    Comment by teenchy — February 12, 2018 @ 9:45 am

  7. Marty had a small role in the Reality TV show fall, where he realized his lameness & got sloppy drunk, Not sure if that was significant.

    Comment by Downpuppy Downs (@Downpuppy) — February 12, 2018 @ 9:49 am

  8. Nice work, John S. Walters! Now I’m picturing Marty coming to behind a dumpster, and having a moment of clarity about where he is and how he got there.

    Comment by Moon Mullins — February 12, 2018 @ 9:53 am

  9. Well shame on me. I missed the days when Marty held sway on Prep Spotlight. Maybe I should go back and read this blog from the beginning instead of just posting on it every few days or so.

    Comment by teenchy — February 12, 2018 @ 12:54 pm

  10. Give Rubin credit: when he decides to do a villain, he can do a villain! This installment of Marty Moon is not quite in the Uncle Gary class, but P3 took some inspiration.

    Comment by Philip — February 12, 2018 @ 1:08 pm

  11. A banner day for the commentariat. First, thanks to billy for bringing back the story of the Perp Spotlight with Jeff Ponczak, who was 6-7. That story cast even farther into the past to bring back Wally Lamb, who ran onto the field at homecoming to tell Gil that Ponczak had a heart condition and could not play. Ponczak and his sidekick Hatt had exchanged medical reports to cover this up.

    John S’s resetting is genius. Once in a lifetime, but he does it regularly. Hitorque’s red flag about Marty’s idiocy going unnoticed is well taken, but that may also be explained by two things, that listeners had not heard Jorge’s name before, or that there may have been no listeners. I also commend him for pointing out that on-air people do not normally have “offices” in local radio. I was once interviewed in a radio station where the reporter kept his stuff in a castoff locker from a demolished high school.

    I agree that Marty is not the menace Uncle Gary was. But he’s just as much of an ass. I am willing to bet that in addition to renaming Jorge “Georgie,” he pronounces his last name to evoke pickles– puh DILL uh.

    Comment by vaganova — February 12, 2018 @ 3:53 pm

  12. John S., like a long line of other people have noted, that was genius the way you wrote out the present scenario. Cleverly done. I was reading your piece while in the waiting room of my dentist’s office and by the time I got my wisdom tooth removed, I was too comfortably numb to respond. But that was damn funny. That just came outta nowhere and took no prisoners. Well done.
    And, sure, why the hell not, Mr. WDIG Radio Staff Member, who we’ll probably never see again because his naked means of subsistence is to fill up space when Berrill or post-Berrill writers draw a blank, me and Marty McGee, when we’re busted flat in Baton Rouge, discuss anti-derivatives and the Chain Rule quite frequently. The penthouse suite at WDIG can be a lonely place. It’s how Euler’s Formula reached a breakthrough.
    Now if only King of Milford Media would beeline to his textbook from his high school Spanish class days and read the section(normally at the beginning of the text) on pronunciations. Surely it’s out in his garage somewhere. Georgie would appreciate it, Martina.

    Comment by tdrewhardin — February 12, 2018 @ 9:02 pm

RSS feed for comments on this post. TrackBack URI

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

Create a free website or blog at

%d bloggers like this: