This Week in Milford

June 14, 2018

Correction: Orange Is the New Dafonte*

gt06142018

*and how many times have I relied on the “Orange Is the New Black” trope? Don’t ask.

Does anyone know how to lay the bases out at Valley Tech?  The outside edge of the bag goes along the baseline with the rest of the bag in fair territory, not the inside of the bag with the rest in foul territory.  Never mind that: does that field have no foul territory or what?  I wonder how many kids hurt themselves chasing after foul balls and falling over that parapet in front of the dugout.  No matter, visiting players shouldn’t swing from the dugout roof.

Valley Tech’s messed up ball field pales in comparison to today’s big reveal: Dafne Dafonte was the second driver!  How else would she be going to prison and seeing Del?   Oh wait, prisons aren’t co-ed?  Never mind.  My head spins with the crazy schemes Dafne could’ve cooked up to make this happen.  Maybe she secretly lusted after True Standish, wanted Boo Radley killed off and, disguised as Shelly from Selasky’s Supper Club, got Del Bader drunk so he would cause death.  Hey, it’s not that much more far-fetched than the idea of Del agreeing to speak to some nosy kid from his son’s high school’s newspaper in order to somehow clear his name.

Meanwhile, another Trumpet staffer, having picked up one of Holly Dobbs’ left-behind wigs, amuses herself with some newfound gadgetry.  Photography/videography buffs, help me out please: isn’t she wearing a steadicam harness?  Are those designed to work with 1960s-era film cameras like the one she’s holding?

metapost: Ned, Tim and the rest of the TWIM community have taken this blog to another level this week.  Here’s hoping I can keep it up.  Thanks to all for keeping this a going concern.

 

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15 Comments »

  1. First off, I have not seen a camera like the one in P2 in about 40 years, (and is that supposed to be a lens hood on the front of it?) but more importantly, she’s treating this guy like he’s some sort of news-worthy convict who has a wealth of DNA evidence, witness recantations, crooked cop cover-ups, etc. proving their innocence, rather than some stupid asshole that killed someone in a DUI accident. Prisons are full of people who made stupid decisions while drunk or stoned…no big story there. Give me a break R&W…..go back to the Moose story…it’s more believable….

    Comment by franku2016 — June 14, 2018 @ 9:44 am

  2. *lens hood

    Fixed! – TimP

    Comment by franku2016 — June 14, 2018 @ 9:44 am

  3. I agree. Back to Palooka. Meanwhile, the photographer’s expression says it all. She’s holding a pre-1970 rangefinder film camera, with a telephoto which inexplicably has a wide-angle lens shade. But as has been pointed out, the Chief has trouble drawing baselines and foul territory, thus a camera which belongs in the Pantheon of Mysterious Objects should not surprise us.

    Comment by vaganova — June 14, 2018 @ 10:05 am

  4. Are we sure that’s a camera and not one of NASA’s Ranger moon probes? Either way, it’s 50+ years old.

    Comment by billytheskink — June 14, 2018 @ 10:50 am

  5. teenchy, didn’t they tell you? It’s the new generation. Bases can be laid down anywhere on the field so long as the plot can run them without obstruction. Just rechalk the 1st base line(and the 3rd base line too(smack)) and the plot oughta stay right on the rails. There should be extra chalk in the equipment shed and as long as the umpiring crew doesn’t object, the plot can do a Kirk Gibson ’88 trot. I mean, both are on gimpy legs.

    Comment by tdrewhardin — June 14, 2018 @ 1:16 pm

  6. “Silence of the Mudlarks”, anyone?

    Comment by lauramac — June 14, 2018 @ 1:51 pm

  7. Lauramac! You’re back!

    Caution, fellow Mfnrdians– things could get kinky. Dafne is “going to prison,” and the most prominent piece of technology pictured is that unclassifiable camera. “Silence” may apply after all. Del’s been in the big house for a couple of years now, thus it is unlikely the interview will be disrupted by an attack of the DTs. I hate to risk jinxing things, but we may have some actual suspense here…

    Comment by vaganova — June 14, 2018 @ 2:08 pm

  8. I assume Del has agreed to see Dafne based on the advice of the same attorney who gave him such excellent advice two years ago.

    Comment by Philip — June 14, 2018 @ 2:17 pm

  9. Brief Rock n RollThursdsy reminder. Local H will be in Joliet for something called Rock the Block this Saturday in downtown Joliet near the Rialto. Kind of a street fest. I don’t have exact times but I would guess Local H will go on no sooner than 6:00 to be followed by Marcy Playground and Everclear. There will be bands playing all day. ROCK ON !!!

    Comment by Jive Turkey — June 14, 2018 @ 4:19 pm

  10. Damn, she’s doing a lot of legwork for a story that might be read by maybe 500 mostly indifferent high schoolers…

    Comment by hitorque — June 14, 2018 @ 4:32 pm

  11. I’m a little more intrigued by the appearance of Dafne’s being turned on by the prospect of “going to prison.” But I’m also adjusting to a loved one’s sudden turn to bdsm. That must be it– just a coincidence.

    Comment by vaganova — June 14, 2018 @ 5:36 pm

  12. Hey vaganova! I’ve been here, just lurking and remembering the good old-fashioned wacky summer plots of yore.

    Comment by lauramac — June 15, 2018 @ 8:28 am

  13. Hey lauramac– good to know you’ve been here all along. I have a terrible feeling that the Baders are going to be this year’s summer plot. You?

    Comment by vaganova — June 15, 2018 @ 8:34 am

  14. ‘Fraid so.

    Comment by lauramac — June 15, 2018 @ 8:46 am

  15. Meanwhile, Del arranges for the warden to get a sweet deal on industrial solvents through some creative invoicing and has in turn begun to earn more privileges.

    Comment by timbuys — June 15, 2018 @ 11:45 am


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