This Week in Milford

July 21, 2018

We’re From Milford, We’re from Milford…

gt07212018
… No one likes us
We don’t care
We’re from Milford
F***in’ Milford
No one likes us
We don’t care

I am Bader
Barry Bader
No one likes me
I don’t care
I am Barry
F***in’ Bader
No one likes me
I don’t care

It’s my dad’s fault
It’s not my fault
It’s my dad’s fault
I don’t care
Didn’t know that
Until last week
It’s my dad’s fault
I don’t care

Where was my mom?
Where was my mom?
For the last year
Did she care?
Did she stand up
To my father?
It’s not my fault
I don’t care

I’m Pelwecki
Kev Pelwecki
I hit homers
No one cares
I’ll beat Shankey’s
F***in’ record
You mean Sharkey?
I don’t care

I am Dafne
On a mission
Get in J-school
I don’t care
I’ll expose my
F***in’ classmates
They don’t like me
I don’t care

I am Ms. Rizk
I will take risks
Name’s ironic?
I don’t care
I just care ’bout
F***in’ Trumpet
I will take risks
I don’t care

I’m Kazinski
Bob Kazinski
I don’t coach much
I don’t care
Hair like Venus
Grab that penis
Off the basepath
I don’t care

I am Gil Thorp
Head Coach Gil Thorp
We’re still playing?
I don’t care
Trust the Process?
There’s no process!
When’s my tee time?
I don’t care

 

Advertisements

6 Comments »

  1. I’m sure that on Planet Whigrub, this will lead to softened feelings, two homers from Palooka, and a good-humored Dutch rub for Barely, while Dafne and Mrs Bader exchange high fives and the Swifty-Mart employees do the wave in the bleachers behind the home dugout. But on other worlds, the more likely outcome would be that Barely’s completely out of character and terminally distracting declaration would hoo-doo the team, leading to a high scoring shutout for Oakwood. It’s a process.

    Comment by vaganova's dresser — July 21, 2018 @ 2:20 pm

  2. The Miracle Transformation is complete! Thanks to Ma and Dafne’s life-altering intervention, Barry is no longer a complete self-absorbed sociopath. He’s now just a garden variety jerk. I guess?

    Comment by jvwalt — July 21, 2018 @ 3:21 pm

  3. It’s over at least, right? Long Island Ice Teas on Monday? It’s over, right?

    Comment by Jive Turkey — July 21, 2018 @ 3:45 pm

  4. Until I learned about “Long Island Iced Tea” on TWIM a few years ago, I had no experience with it and did not realize it was basically pure liquor. I have since inferred that it is a defense mechanism: Long Islanders tend to bask in the distinction of being Long Islanders, without realizing that to the rest of New York, Long Island is a laughingstock rather than a paradise. Go Lizzie Grubman!

    Comment by vaganova's dresser — July 21, 2018 @ 4:01 pm

  5. Fuck you, Howdy Doody. You’ve been a dick all year and now because of one lame pep talk from your drippy Mom, you’re ok? Yeah, right….

    Comment by franku2016 — July 21, 2018 @ 5:22 pm

  6. Gil and Kaz look like they are ready to sneak away and get it on too

    Comment by franku2016 — July 21, 2018 @ 5:24 pm


RSS feed for comments on this post. TrackBack URI

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

Create a free website or blog at WordPress.com.

%d bloggers like this: