This Week in Milford

October 31, 2018

It’s Not Just The Win That’s Moot


Marty had a point

Season is already lost

So bench best player


Even if he starts

An impromptu striptease in

Front of the coaches


Gil’s a defeatist

Many teams make the postseason

With losing records


So can we assume

There are less than two games left?

Please let it be so


Making kids examples

To show that Gil has standards

It’s the Milford way


Until he finds out

Tiki has legit reasons

Then he must save face


He’ll give Marty

Some lame-assed excuse about

Special teams lapses


If he’d spent more time

On the offense, they would face

Fewer fourth downs


What happened to Joe

And Kaz’s fancy software?

Bolek could have helped


Or was he busy

Hanging the uniforms so

Neatly in lockers?






  1. Tiki looks like he’s about to shit himself before he gets to the men’s room; maybe he is sick of this story too.

    Comment by franku2016 — October 31, 2018 @ 9:18 am

  2. …and who the fuck hangs pictures of random shit in a football locker?

    Comment by franku2016 — October 31, 2018 @ 9:19 am

  3. If this keeps up, I’m about to beg for the return of that punter/poseur film geek loser…

    Comment by hitorque — October 31, 2018 @ 10:08 am

  4. I’d say this plot is moving at a glacial pace, but what with global warming and all, glaciers are running laps around “Gil Thorp.”

    Comment by jvwalt — October 31, 2018 @ 12:32 pm

  5. Glaciers are running laps around all of us.

    That said, I can’t think of a football coach I know who would not bench a player for arriving this late for a game. Gil may reinstate him for the second half if he finds the player was blameless. When you are a member of a team you are expected to do whatever needs to be done to ensure you are prepared and on time, but once in a great while, as the bumper sticker used to say, Things Happen.

    Comment by vaganova — October 31, 2018 @ 2:30 pm

  6. Don’t expect to get it dirty in this featureless void within which we’re suspended.

    Comment by timbuys — October 31, 2018 @ 3:15 pm

  7. Exploding eyeballs/straight from The Joker/Gil was desperate

    Tiki has diarrhea/Did he wipe?/Did he flush?

    Gil has compassion/Ditto Kaz/Nice bowling jackets

    Tiki and I/learn life is new/try something new/like haiku

    But be on time, Tiki/If you want to learn/life is like that

    Comment by tdrewhardin — October 31, 2018 @ 4:28 pm

  8. My grandfather was the only child of the only sister of three brothers. I’m told my mom’s Nana was a wonderful woman. Unfortunately, she married poorly. Despite that, Nana’s brothers were all successful in business so my grandfather had gainful employment from a young age.

    One day, one of his uncles told him to meet him precisely at such and such a time at the corner of This street and That avenue. There was a car dealership at the location. My grandfather showed up a few minutes late. Upon meeting him, his uncle told him that he had intended to buy a car for him but if he wasn’t responsible enough to show up on time, how could he be trusted with a car.

    If I’m not five minutes early, I feel like I’m ten minutes late.

    Comment by timbuys — October 31, 2018 @ 4:48 pm

  9. timbuys, you are singing my song. I am in an unusual field, ballet, and sometimes we joke that it is one of the few occupations in which if you’re on time, you’re late. “Class at 6:30” doesn’t mean you arrive at 6:30, it means that the music starts at 6:30, and that you are expected not only to be present, but dressed, warmed up, and focused on the task at hand. From what I have seen, football coaches take the same approach, thus Tiki is going to have to have one hell of a story. Given that he is thus far what John Gardner used to refer to as “the clown/victim,” I suspect he will.

    Comment by vaganova — October 31, 2018 @ 6:00 pm

  10. “If Gil Thorp doesn’t care about winning football games, then you can’t expect his players to care. It’s a wonder why they show up at all. With all the talent on this team they could easily be undefeated! Thorps laissez-faire attitude has finally caught up with him. Maybe the school board will wise up and get a coach who has a little fire in his belly!”
    Marty might say something like that. Or anyone with a pulse would.

    Comment by Jive Turkey — October 31, 2018 @ 7:56 pm

  11. It’s funny because nobody in the Milfordverse has a cell phone, evidently…

    Comment by hitorque — November 1, 2018 @ 10:05 am

  12. The Synchronized Exploding Eyeballs in panel 2 are a nice touch.

    Comment by jvwalt — November 1, 2018 @ 11:50 am

  13. […] When Gil felt like it […]

    Pingback by The Constraint Reappears | This Week in Milford — July 6, 2019 @ 7:35 am

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