This Week in Milford

January 7, 2019

Who’s Robby? Wait, Who’s Gil Thob?

Filed under: Coach Kaz, Fontastic, Kelly Krystek — nedryerson @ 7:03 am

010719

We pick up our story with Kelly Krystek, intrepid travel agent on her way to drop off Mrs. Kapoor’s travel related items, stopped by the side of the road to take in the latest provocative billboard outside Milford. The message on the billboard is so jarring she has to get out of her Toyota Tardis and stare up at in in wonder from the shoulder. Her head bobbling awe is reminiscent of Steve Martin in L.A. Story:

lastory11

Kelly communicates this incredible outdoor advertising development to her beau, Coach Kaz. Kaz is visibly shaken by this new message, or maybe he’s not moved at all and just thinking about pumping iron, getting a sandwich or just avoiding another dopey assignment from Gil to go snooping around in the affairs of a student athlete.

So we have the big reveal of billboard #3 (in a bold new font that I don’t have time to identify right now): SAVE THE KIDS FIRE GIL THORP robbyreport.com. Oh boy. Now to find out who Robby is and what his report entails.

At the moment, the domain robbyreport.com is available for purchase, so any enterprising individual who wants to get a little bit of exposure can register that domain and link it to whatever content they want to be seen by up to dozens of bored Gil Thorp readers. (You may recall a previous website that was named in Gil Thorp, liniverde.com. Jason bought that domain and redirected it to this very blog [since lapsed]. I’d do that with the robbyreport.com, but that would require effort that I’m unwilling to exert.)

This fictitious website concept reminds me of a development from the Aughts (do we have another name for the first decade of this century?) where Conan O’Brien threw out an offhand reference to hornymanatee.com on his old NBC late night show. Subsequently, he stated that NBC’s legal department required the show to acquire that domain (which they did and then proceeded to use it to host wacky content). It makes sense for a big television network to take that step, lest somebody else register the domain and host something with which the network would rather not be associated. Also, in “those days” there was still some fun to be had about the internet and its geeky structure and we could still laugh at it rather than be largely bored and/or disgusted with it.

Clearly, the producers of the Gil Thorp comic strip don’t care about someone purchasing robbyreport.com and posting something weird on it. Like maybe a blog about how Kelly Krystek’s little hatchback has the interior of a Landcruiser or something. Oh, now wouldn’t that just be embarrassing! Surely, but for who?

ETA: The Comics Curmudgeon came up with a hilarious take on today’s strip, focusing on the vague wording of the latest billboard and how the message very easily be misconstrued as something VERY dark. That never dawned on me. That’s why he’s the most famous comics blogger!

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9 Comments »

  1. FINALLY. I’ve been saying “Fire Gil Thorp” for years, every time he hacks his way out of the playdowns. My outburst of maniacal laughter is somewhat tempered by the fact that Robby/Bobby’s status as an annoying douche has been firmly established, and we know this is going to end with a patented Gil Thorp Life Lesson, delivered just as the team fails to make the playdowns. Again.

    Comment by jvwalt — January 7, 2019 @ 8:07 am

  2. Moon had better get involved in this story, otherwise, why is he even still in Milford?

    I’m not opposed to the “fire Gil” crowd, however, I also don’t see any reason to believe that Dr. Pearl or the school board would be capable of hiring someone better. They’d probably wind up hiring a coach away from Goshen or something. They would earn major points if they replaced Gil-Mimi with Mark Tabor-Jessie Jensen, though.

    Comment by billytheskink — January 7, 2019 @ 8:50 am

  3. Is that Larry Cutter on the ladder? I bet he really hated to put that up. But, he had a job to do. Will strip finally entertain?

    Comment by Jive Turkey — January 7, 2019 @ 10:18 am

  4. I tagged this one as ‘Fontastic’ and I love that the ‘s’ on the sign guy’s shirt is the same as the sign itself. Tragically, it doesn’t match the Skyborne advertising logo.

    So, Robby bought two months on “the two open billboards closest to Milford.”

    In that time he has sought to draw the attention of both Milfordians and those fortunate souls who are just passing through with the following:

    12/14 & 12/18: Is Mediocre Good Enough? Medium Bold font

    12/24: Don’t Our Kids Deserve Better? Skinny font

    1/7: Save The Kids Fire Gil Thorp Hissing Cobra S (chunky) font

    I don’t want to speak for my community, but I think if someone did this in our area, at most, it might get a mention on Next Door in a thread that quickly gets moderated…

    In any case, with a name like Skyborne, Robby clearly should have hired them to fly one of those prop planes that always look they’re about to stall out to drag a huge banner simply stating ‘Fire Thorp’. Run it for a couple of hours the afternoon of the last game of the football season and that’d get a conversation started among the relevant community. Moreso than nearly a month of cryptic messaging at any rate.

    Comment by timbuys — January 7, 2019 @ 11:46 am

  5. And how is this all going to tie in to the hi jinks of Fillion, or will it be a separate story?

    Comment by franku2016 — January 7, 2019 @ 12:39 pm

  6. One possibility: Bobby will somehow harm Mike Filion’s state of mind (not because he has ADHD but because he is a grandiose asshole) and Gil will look after Filion and make Bobby and his robbyreport look ridiculous. It will end with Mike Filion “getting help” while Mfnrd’s basketball fans dance in the lobby of the gym.

    Comment by vaganova — January 7, 2019 @ 1:16 pm

  7. The alternative for the “Aughts” would be the “O’s”, although we’d risk confusion with the terminology many women use for their orgasms.

    Comment by Moon Mullins — January 7, 2019 @ 3:03 pm

  8. And which high altitude climbers call their oxygen supplies.

    Comment by vaganova — January 7, 2019 @ 3:53 pm

  9. Good lord. I crawled out from under my retirement rock when Ned mentioned I had once purchased “liniverde.com” when it was mentioned in the strip.

    “I did that?” I thought to myself. And yep, apparently nearly 8 years ago, I invested my live savings of $12.17 to purchase that domain, since nobody else wanted it. https://gilthorp.wordpress.com/2011/02/17/domain-remains-the-same/ Apparently my memory doesn’t go back that far. Who are all you people and what are you doing on my lawn?

    So… to whoever has purchased robbyreport.com and parked it at GoDaddy, good luck to you. I hope it brings you the same fame and fortune as Gil Thorp domain purchasing has brought me for nearly a decade now.

    [Returns under retirement rock on own private island.]

    Comment by jasbeattie — January 8, 2019 @ 7:06 pm


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