This Week in Milford

August 20, 2021

Idiots 101

Boy if we had any notions that Rubin knew squat about golf, this summer storyline proved it. We’ve gone over the ludicrous dialogue enough already; suffice it to say all todays panels are are the cherry on the horseshit sundae.

P1 – Nobody puts their clubs in the car like that– you put the club end in first, then the bottom of the bag is the last part in. And for gods sakes– Hendricks knows the way out! Did he just go blind? I know his eyes are shut as he dutifully deposits his bag in his trunk ( as everyone does after every round Ive ever played) but jesus, has he been fuckin LIVING at the course?? Did he forget where the door was?! Imagine living with these douchbags for 3 months. I’d rather live in that cornfield where his ball was, along with a thousand others. I havent gotten over Gil searching a cornfield for what MAY be Carters ball– any goddamn golfer with any time in the game knows no matter how good you are you can still yank one into the cornfield. Scratch or no scratch. And the cost of the ball– I dont belong to a country club but the pro CARING about the difference between a $4 ball and a $1.50 ball, when dues for these places are thousands of dollars… is just lunacy. Who the hell buys balls one at a time anyway??

I’ve been playing golf since 1978, and not one of these statements made in this storyline has ever been made by me or anyone I’ve either played with, or come in contact with, or said on a TV broadcast of a tournament.

P2– Well gee, Heather needed the lowest possible course in college to do research that any 12 year old could do. So all the pro did was bring Carter into the room and BS him about pressing charges and writing a check. I really found a couple things hard to believe– that 15 years later he looked that similar that Heather knew it was him– I’ve seen what 15 years does to some people. Next, why would Carter keep THE SAME raincoat in his bag for 15 years? You play golf a lot your bag wears out too, and getting a new bag means tossing the old junk in the old one out. And my old raincoat literally made me wetter after so long, so I got another one. AND WHY KEEP A COLLEGE RAINCOAT ANYWAY? I keep an old winter hat from my college– in my closet so it doesnt get worn out. Who cares about raincoats??

P3– so the pro was just BS-ing Carter– well, so much for any credibility HE has. If I’m Carter I dont send him shit– I move on to the next club where everyone there has a goddamn brain and an IQ above 65. And I go about my business and keep on raking in the dough, and nobody will give a fuck about my $1.50 balls or my damn raincoat or my handicap. Getting away from these morons is the best thing thats happened to Carter. As Green Day sang— Good Riddance!

8 Comments »

  1. Based on P3, I wonder if Rubin actually paid attention to the comments about really asking a hustler for a check and decided to wrap this bullshit story up quickly while making Heather look like fucking Geraldo Rivera or something and landing a big print newspaper job, like those still exist for fresh college grads

    Comment by franku2016 — August 20, 2021 @ 9:32 pm

  2. They shove this guy off ( as if these candy asses could accomplish this in real life) when they should offering him a job; teaching kids how to golf. Because Gil sure as fuck can’t.

    Comment by Jive Turkey — August 20, 2021 @ 9:39 pm

  3. I’d love to see CH giving lessons! Mfnrd kids would take to tanking, betting, & fake names like Gil to red shirts.

    Comment by Downpuppy — August 21, 2021 @ 12:16 am

  4. And I can’t blame the colorist for John Jawor’s dye job, because he’s also lost his widows peak, eyes, & 30 years in the last 10 days.

    Comment by Downpuppy — August 21, 2021 @ 10:31 am

  5. Well, I’d said awhile back that Cart Hendricks may be able to knock the dimples off a golf ball, but he’s got utter shit for brains…

    I will spend no more of my time or attention on this craptacular storyline.

    Comment by Hitorque — August 21, 2021 @ 11:15 am

  6. Rob, as you and several others have mentioned, the only thing Milford CC can do is expel him from the premises and if he comes back unauthorized, then you have a felony for trespassing. Otherwise, Pretty Boy Floyd disguised as Arnold Palmer really didn’t work but according to Thorpiverse, why let reality get in the way of a good story?

    Comment by tdrewhardin — August 21, 2021 @ 3:45 pm

  7. […] noticed John Jawor had dyed his hair yesterday and didn’t want him to feel self-conscious so she dyed hers in […]

    Pingback by I Love Ducey | This Week in Milford — August 21, 2021 @ 8:12 pm

  8. […] Not until then would the coaches have cared about what he does off the court. We already had the “gambling is bad, mmmmkay?” story line this past summer. Did we really need it […]

    Pingback by “Jefferson beat MYOB, that’s how Jefferson did.” | This Week in Milford — February 5, 2022 @ 3:46 pm


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