This Week in Milford

October 1, 2021

But of course

Filed under: actual action, football, freak hands, Marty Moon — robmize2013 @ 9:15 pm
Firs

First off thanks again to Teenchy for filling in while I was camping in bear country last weekend. Upper Michigan is a beautiful sight this time of year with the changing leaves, and the weather was even more calm then last year.

Back to the game– Gil is managing to blow this lead as we figured, as Tevin only has 1 hand on the rock as its punched away a la Peanut Tillman in his Bear heyday. Whatever that glove is on Claxtons hand, it isnt sticky enough to hold the ball. Safe and smart all right Gil. Its been a fairly close game, and no matter what formation you run, whether its the Delaware Hens or the Baltimore Chop, you still need TWO hands on the ball when running out the clock. And in an evenly matched contest, ‘a few first downs’ on 1 drive is almost impossible. Gildo acts like its routine. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool Gil 20 times, ….. he comes back for more.

8 Comments »

  1. Gil Thorp= stupid fucker.

    Comment by Jive Turkey — October 1, 2021 @ 9:53 pm

  2. 1. AND IT’S A FUMBLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!! (In my best Chris Berman/Keith Jackson voice)

    2. Serves Claxton right for not participating in Boyd Spiller’s Madden ’22 ladder the other day, I guess? Maybe working that PS5 controller for a night would have strengthened his finger muscles to grip the ball better?

    3. If Spiller even LOOKS like he’s going to spew the work “choke” or something similar, Tevin Claxton needs to pummel the ever-living fuck out of him right there in the locker room.

    4. Having said that…. Hey Tevin!! That ain’t a loaf of bread you’re carrying! Because that ball seemed to pop out with relative ease from one half-assed swipe…

    5. Sorry, but I have to mention that last year’s team supposedly suffered from constant shuffling and disharmony of THREE(!) quarterbacks ranging in ability from average to mediocre and NOT ONE OF THEM COUGHED UP THE BALL IN CRUNCH TIME DEEP IN THEIR OWN TERRITORY IN A CLOSE GAME!

    6. And I’ve read this strip long enough to know that not one person in the entire state of Michigan or Illinois or Missouri or wherever the hell Milford is will dare question why Most Exalted Generalissimo Gilberto Tharpe had his QB (in only his second varsity start against a hard-hitting defense) running a keeper in crunch time instead of his Beast-Stud All-World RB, Chance the Gardner… Especially not Heather Oliver/Tafoya/Kolber/Andrews/Musberger/Arute in her stupid fawning postgame interview… Because Gilberto Belichick is never wrong, has never been wrong and for anyone to suggest as much is an act of high treason and a heresy condemned by the Vatican…

    7. And I see Heather Burns made the #10 spot on SportCenter’s “Not Top 10” today! I know this girl is from Michigan and not Iowa, but work with me here:

    Comment by Hitorque — October 1, 2021 @ 9:55 pm

  3. Hey, tdrewhardin, you got your ears on?
    I’ll do tomorrow’s post sometime midday-ish. You’ve earned your weekend off.

    Moon looks like he’s ready to chew through his crate.

    Comment by nedryerson — October 1, 2021 @ 10:33 pm

  4. Thanks, Ned. You da Man. I love reading your posts because your sense of humor is uncanny. I’ll be expecting more of the same tomorrow.

    Marty Moon could be singing in Il Barbiere di Saviglia and no one would notice the difference. But Gil “Cut My Own” Thorp is certainly giving Moon incentive. Make sure the wrapping paper doesn’t rip when you hand another gift to an opponent.

    Comment by tdrewhardin — October 1, 2021 @ 10:44 pm

  5. Hitorque – I skipped to the end of the lowlights & sure enough, UMass made #1 with a lame punt attempt. Having a school in the area where QuestionableContent is set go FBS is working out even worse than the people who tried to stop it expected.

    Comment by Downpuppy — October 2, 2021 @ 2:28 am

  6. Looks like Ming the Merciless is ordering his minions to find and kill Flash Gordon there in P3.

    Comment by MopMan — October 2, 2021 @ 6:18 am

  7. Yeah Candy ass Heather will never put Gil on the spot the way Marty will. She’s useless af. I’m surprised Gil hasn’t tried passing the ball like dumb ass Pete Caroll did in that super bowl goal line play.

    Comment by franku2016 — October 2, 2021 @ 7:50 am

  8. Yeah, UMass is a mess… But schools start dreaming about the potential dollars that comes with playing D-I football and damn the risks or consequences…

    Comment by Hitorque — October 2, 2021 @ 10:55 am


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