This Week in Milford

July 25, 2018

Inside-The-Park For Barry Bader!

Filed under: actual action, baseball, shadow figures — timbuys @ 4:15 am

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Lotta chain link fence today taking in a relatively large amount of actual action.

My favorite thing about today’s strip is in panel three where it is clear the entire team (including the guys on base that he drove in I guess?) is pretending what happened didn’t just happen.

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July 18, 2018

Competing To Alienate Everyone

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Guys and Gals, can I ask a (kinda) serious question?

What does it say that, of the Bader Family Trio, Ma Bader is the least functional and possibly most psychologically damaged?

I bet those frames don’t even have prescription lenses in them.

Edited to add Frank Zappa’s tribute to the imaginary journalistic profession, Packard Goose:

July 11, 2018

Meanwhile Barry Bader Is Posting Angry Rants To Youtube

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And Gil hasn’t even noticed his absence from… practice? I guess? Shouldn’t Kevin be getting rejected as a QB from the local 7 on 7 teams?

Panel one: As I don’t understand the difference, with respect to baseball teams, between D-II and JuCo (and can’t be bothered to research it), I’m going to guess Gil did the ‘right’ thing in steering Ryan to D-II. Of course this is the second or third time we’ve even mentioned Ryan’s recruitment even though he’s a hard throwing lefty so… another job well done by all involved.

Panel two: “On the other hand, if he hurts his arm, they’ll drop him like a rock and he’ll end up pumping gas at the station outside of whatever town D-II School is in.”

Panel three: “What about The Secret?” “I suspect people will be asking why we’re still talking about that guy for the rest of our lives (of reading Gil Thorp).”

Minus point: What exactly is even going on today? Seriously, at this point I’d almost be OK going down to Milford Country Club to watch Gil ruin the game of golf for a bunch of preadolescents.

July 4, 2018

Happy Thorp Of July, Everyone!

Filed under: Boredom in Milford, Chunky Bracelets, Just plain sad, Milford Idiots — timbuys @ 6:07 am

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Please enjoy the adult beverage of your choice in moderate moderation and set off lots of fireworks!

P1: Wouldn’t it be better to have, rather than a more or less anonymous character ask, someone like Ryan Von Auken poking holes in K-Pel’s aspirations?

P2: Sigh.

P3: Double sigh.

Edited to add the following as it looks like our Fourth will be washed out. I was at this show (one of two that night). It was incredible.

Edited to further add the following:

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June 27, 2018

Clearly The Recipient Of Gil’s Call Is A Former Player…

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Because, just like the rest of us, he’s as surprised as hell to find Gil taking any sort of interest in him.

FWIW, per some cursory research, for Michigan State and Ohio State (to name two State U’s in the nominal vicinity of Milford) the average entering GPA’s are rather higher than 3.5. Let’s hope Kev was taking lots of AP courses… hey, maybe that’s where he got tipped off to the whole launch angles thing.

Just to wrap things up before I turn my attention to more serious concerns, but what is going on with all of the awkward chin touching by Counselor Drew? I mean panel one is I guess kinda normal (well, that flipper does look like it could be thalidomide induced), but your guess is as good as mine when it comes to whatever messed up salute or gang sign she is flashing at Gil in panel two. I don’t think wrists quite bend that way…

HEJA SVERIGE, Y’ALL!

June 20, 2018

I Would Have Guessed That, At Some Point, A Permission Slip Of Some Sort Would Need To Have Been Signed

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P1: Whatever Ms. Rizzkk is on probably needs to be dosed a little lower. The way she vacantly smiles while DD and (checks back to May 12th) Jay Bhatia discuss such weighty matters is disconcerting to say the least.

P2: Speaking of disconcerting, in a strip with a long history of poorly depicted high fives (seriously!), this one enters the canon and impels me to create a new category.

P3: Holy Shit! Someone tell Chief Linde to check the Bader family’s crawlspace!

Song that came to mind while writing today’s post:

June 19, 2018

Great Moments In Milford Journalism

Are not depicted in the above. Please stay tuned in for the inimitable T. Drew Hardin’s commentary coming right up!

In the meantime, please feel free to fire away.

Minus points: Since when did Marjie adopt the poking out ear look?

June 13, 2018

Coaches Want Travelers And Campers

Filed under: Boredom in Milford, Coach Kaz, Gil Thorp, Just plain sad, Milford Idiots — timbuys @ 6:12 am

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P1: About College ball… You’ve never come across as the scholarly type, so why not try out for the Central City Boxmakers? They play exhibition games for beer money and seem about on your level. Last I heard, Slim Chance was picking up cleanup innings in between gigs at local county fairs.

P2: Besides, coaches want kids who have enriched them over the years through the provision of free (amateur) labor and camp tuition. They especially like it when they’ve had the chance to groom these kids away from their parents. Then again, if anyone on the team could use some groomin’… Maybe at least buy you a scrunchy or something.

P3: And after an almost interminable lecture on the walk from the locker room to the field, none of this gets through to Kevin. I’m going to have to assume that Kaz has some bluetooth buds plugged in and is jamming out to the greatest hits the early twenty-first century has to offer.

Bonus Points: I award none today.

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