This Week in Milford

February 18, 2017

Ain’t No Answer in Me

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As expected, today’s installment reveals nothing except a potential physiological cause for Aaron’s inconsistent play: his horrible, horrible hip dysplasia.

What else to highlight? EES from some Milford rando, the usual shiny floors and Prairie Style windows, a couple other Milford randos shrinking back in fear from Raging Aaron? I’m going for Ken Brown’s nasty Gillette Fusion cut while maintaining his sideburns. Y’know, I’d kinda like to examine what Rubin’s done with Big Ken’s character over the past couple of seasons but I think that could get touchy. I think for now we can all agree that he’s been given feet of clay.

Post title came to me before anything else this morning. Rather than the more obvious invitation of comparisons between Gwen’s cover and the original, I thought of a more confrontational response.

February 15, 2017

McShanes Hardware – For All Your Escheresque Building Needs

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Folks, can we just mosey on past panels one and two? Thanks.

That brings us to McSHANES [sic], where we get a comparative bonanza of new information! Viz., Quad-A’s mother’s first name is Tina (not sure what street drugs that’s code for) and she’s in the back of a hardware store, which is presumably her place of employment.

January 28, 2017

Feed and Granger

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As Ned would say, “It’s Madison Time!”

Have you ever seen a basketball court where the free throw lane is three times as wide as the tipoff circle? No, that can’t be the three-point line since the lines for the lane are coming straight down from it with no top of the key in between. The basket doesn’t exactly line up, either. Follow that up with the weirdly foreshortened right arm of the Madison hooper and Aaron Aagard’s exploding forelock and the visuals are a bit much to take today.

Why am I expounding on this minutiae? Because it will come as no surprise on Monday when Quadruple A (channeling his inner El Hechizado in P3), missing his mommy, bricks the easy inside shot and sends Milford falling from the ranks of the undefeated. After that, we’ll spend the rest of next week trying to find out What’s Eating Aaron Aagard.

December 27, 2016

Taking An Elbow To The Neck Is A Kind Of Participation

Filed under: actual action, anatomically implausible, basketball — timbuys @ 9:41 am

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As Gil, Kaz and, apparently, the refs continue to ignore the proceedings, Ken takes his chance to step in and perform the coaching duties.

Question: Is that a window in the top right corner of panel one?

Edited to add: Seriously, is it a scoreboard? I can’t even be sure whether it is projecting out into the room or sunk back into the wall and don’t get me started on what those two little dots might be.

December 21, 2016

Impressed That Someone Born Shortly Before The Turn Of The Century Makes ‘I Love Lucy’ References

Filed under: ?, anatomically implausible, Boredom in Milford — timbuys @ 8:56 am

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I suppose it’s important to establish the domestic situation of Milford basketball players early in the arc as it seems we’ve seen more than a few of them (Andrew Gregory and Ted Pearse for example) where that drove the plot.

Other than that, not much to say about today’s strip other than I’m impressed by Ma Aardvark’s flexible neck.

November 16, 2016

So, Who Is Coaching The QB’s At Milford Anyway?

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Among my many athletic shortcomings, the ability to throw overhand is perhaps the worst. That said, I can confidently state that my technique is better than Hakeem’s in panel two.

Bonus point: We have upgraded from an Ampeg 6×10 to the mighty Ampeg 8×10!

October 20, 2016

Après Moi, Le Pelwecki

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So now Kevin is the fifth-string quarterback, between the Mississippi National Guard and the League of Women Voters. No actual word on who the second-, third- or fourth-stringers are. Also no word as to why The Secret Pelwecki is getting some reps under center. Maybe Gil thought he hadn’t made enough belittling dickish comments for the day.

Finally, no word on how Rick Scott knows how Pete DeWindt hurt himself on that big block. Perhaps he is The Injury Whisperer, much as his new understudy Heather fancies herself The Quarterback Whisperer. I suppose this presages the position switch The Real Pelwecki tipped us off to: not to QB but to TE (as this strip prints it). I’m sure Gil will cook up a play that lets him make a handoff – some kind of reverse or double reverse.

September 17, 2016

A Little Plot Sprain – er, Twist

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You’d be forgiven for thinking that’s Patrick Stewart or Sir Stirling Moss (who turns 87 today!) but no, it’s Trainer Rick Scott, in a close-up the likes of which we’ve not seen in some time.  Rick looks like he’s sporting an extra digit on his right hand but I could be mistaken.

Heather Burns’ attitude toward Rick reminds me of this old Judy Tenuta chestnut:

Is Heather planning to use her spot on Rick’s staff to get to the football field and the placekicker’s spot? Or does she have some other ulterior motive, like satisfying her ankle fetish?

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