This Week in Milford

April 21, 2017

Only a matter of time..

Filed under: Central City Cretins, Coach Kaz, Gil Thorp — robmize2013 @ 7:41 pm

Well its nice that Gil and Kaz need to look at the stat sheet (where the hell do they get one at a high school game, unless its the actual scorebook, and I doubt it) to figure out how Raging Ryan pitched and how long. They dont bother to count pitches, or count to 2 innings without paper help.

Good ol Barry Bader still bitching about his spot in the order — I’m sure I told a story last year about my  similar experience coaching pony leaguers in the 90’s. But I cant find it now so trust me – –

And back in Trouble (Central) City, we have girl softball players discussing Ryan at Milford, as if they think he should be somewhere else.. stay tuned, my nose detects some interesting times ahead in the near future..

April 11, 2017

We’ll be calling him “The Friendly Brain”

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Today the high-rolling Milford School Board veep gets a mashup name from the famed comic and cartoon character and the famed pro wrestling heel manager but one that yields no Google results on its own.  He looks like a slightly paunchy version of Gil, and the trifecta of head bobble, exploding eye and freak hand (missing an amputated sixth digit between index and middle fingers) make him right at home in Milford.

He’s clearly capable of picking up a phone and calling Dr. Pearl who, with that broken right wrist of hers, may have had to put him on speaker.  The good doctor relays his message to Ms. Rizk, who replies with a deft pop culture/product placement zinger of her own.  She may not be much of a journalist, but she knows where she stayed last night.

A couple of cameos to report: the Funkyverse’s Les Moore joins the Milford faculty after having his face slapped for being such a pretentious douche, and an off-camera cameo by Rex Morgan, MD‘s daughter Sarah, who obviously hand-lettered Dr. Pearl’s name plate.

April 6, 2017

Southpaw Ex Machina

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“He’s poised, he’s been well coached, he throws hard.  You can tell he’s not from Milford.”

Just as with True Standish in 2014-15, Gil’s chestnuts will be pulled from the proverbial fire by a transfer student. No need to develop this guy as a player or as a character.

But just how impressive is he?  Sure you’re gonna make the catcher’s mitt vap pop (vape? I thought Milford High was a no-smoking campus) if you’re throwing from 20 feet away.   Back up to a regulation distance and let’s hear what happens.

As for his name, when I saw it first it made me think of two 1930s-era pitchers, Johnny “Double No-Hit” Vander Meer and Elden Auker, but he appears to be in sales or engineering.  So how does Pete de Windt know him?  Maybe they ran into each other at the Tulip Time Festival.  Wonder if they know the DeGroots

March 11, 2017

Come for the Gun Show, Stay for the Hypotheticals

Filed under: big arms, Coach Kaz, Gil Thorp, hideous scar faces, Milford Weirdos — teenchy @ 12:02 pm

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I know Kaz is on record as regretting getting his tat, but if it has the power to migrate from one arm to the other, it must be pretty special. Maybe that’s why he hasn’t had it removed. Not sure what’s got Gil lathered up more: Kaz’s gun show, his own puny bicep curls, or memories of Hobart, Bill “Wildcat” Maris or some other pains in the ass on the Booster Club/School Board who’ll try to meddle in his efforts to help Aaron get those three squares he so desperately needs.

After the workout it’s off to the shiny halls of Milford High, where Gil and the COUNSELOR continue to speak obtusely past each other about Tina Aagard. Maybe Tina’ll get some dinner (if not some jail time) out of the deal, too.

March 9, 2017

Aangry Aaron Aacts Out

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Well here we go again with that staple of soap strip continuity, repeating yesterday’s last panel as today’s first panel.  As pointed out in yesterday’s TWIM comments, since when did Ken and Mike ever really talk to Aaron beyond their amateur detective questioning?

Aaron lets his paw do the talking in P2 as he, Ken and unidentified Mudlark hooper (sans freckles, not likely Mike) soar just below the rim.  Such hang time!  Imagine what Aaron could do on three squares a day.  Maybe we’ll soon find out.

Finally, once I convinced myself that the “f” in “shift” wasn’t silent, I wondered exactly what first shift Kaz intended to take.  Babysitting the locker room post-practice?  Feeding Aaron?  Or what?

 

February 22, 2017

A Linebacker In Short Pants

Filed under: ?, basketball, big arms, Coach Kaz, Milford Weirdos — timbuys @ 10:01 am

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Panel 1: I almost want to run the color version of today’s strip as the electric blue over black shirt under with tie look is quite a striking look on Kaz.

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Oh yeah… Don’t even ask me what is going on with Kaz’s collar or how he knotted his tie.

Panel 2: Julius needs to layoff the Nutboyz and the Freezi Bombs if he wants to look good in those short pants.

Panel 3: Mike and Ken really should keep this thing to themselves rather than just blab on and on in the locker room. Their fixation on Aaron is starting to get rather unhealthy it seems…

February 20, 2017

Nice Defense, Paulie Walnuts

Filed under: actual action, basketball, Coach Kaz, Gil Thorp — nedryerson @ 5:30 am

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Milford is hosting Valley Tech. If you can peer back through all the ineffectual sleuthing of the last few weeks worth of strips, you’ll recall that Aaron predicted he was going to have a big game. He probably shouldn’t get in the game at all given the mouthing off in panel one, but we know Gil’s selective attention allows players to get away such violations.

Let’s focus on those suits! Kaz is sporting an electric blue zoot suit over a black shirt/white tie combo. Gil is more conservative yet stylish, but…check out Gil’s shirt! Sure it’s likely just one of those wacky colorist mistakes, but it appears you can see through Coach Thorp to the bleachers behind him. Is Gil just a hologram? That would explain so much!

Now it’s time for Aaron to have his big game. Let’s watch.

 

February 8, 2017

Standard Odds

Filed under: Boredom in Milford, Coach Kaz, Gil Thorp, Milford Weirdos — timbuys @ 8:49 am

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I’m sorry about missing yesterday’s post, folks, and am grateful to Rob for filling in on short notice!

I picked up on panel two being a flashback, but it wasn’t until the second or third time I read the strip that I noticed the beveled corners. Annnnd, that’s about all I have to say about today’s snoozer. Tune in tomorrow when we may or may not see the plot advance.

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