I’m firing that pig!

Well so much for Animal Farm being a difference maker in this storyline. That pig must be rolling his eyes as he rolls in the mud reading this strip. We’re back down that long slippery slope to nothing. Its so bad you wonder whether this strip was intended to run a week ago, before the book assignment. And Rubin forgot about it and is just now running it, so out of sequence is the mindset of the characters. Maybe Molly threw in the towel about her synchronized skating  (and for that matter the softball team) and is just enjoying her role in life as the president of the Tool Cool Club. Who the hell is this committee anyway? I cant believe any high school male would get that excited about getting a button like that. And does Tyler even know about this TC shit? His first question should be — ‘What committee?’

Even Molly’s logic is flawed. Hey — writing screenplays is a BYPRODUCT of ones education, just like doing a science project is a byproduct of getting schooled in science and Applying that knowledge. So it aint too cool for school. TC buttons should go to kids who are so cocky they dont want to learn whats being taught and put the effort into the process. These 2 guys dont qualify at all– but Molly is such a fuckin dimwit she cant tell the difference. And she ordered more badges– I know the first batch was 50, so we will have 100 Milford students walking around campus on June 10 when everyone else is working on their summer tan, with these silly things that will be forgotton as soon as the next storyline commences. As some Spanish guy said -De Sooner De Better.

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Going Dutch at the Coffee Cantina?

Here at TWIM we’ve pretty much concluded Milford is in Michigan. While it’s true Michigan has some Dutch influences, I totally did not expect the Coffee Cantina to turn into a full-blown Amsterdam coffeeshop overnight. Had to run with the color version to confirm that the brownie was indeed a brownie. You know it’s a great brownie when you haven’t even taken a bite out of it. Contact high much?

Everyone (including myself) who had written Linda off as a loser who was willing to turn down a volley scholly because she wasn’t yet Olympian material can just hold that thought, at least for today. Skipping practice doesn’t necessarily mean you’ve given up on your sport (remember Allen Iverson?).

The less said about Mimi’s heavy-handed Animal Farm assignment, the better. I’m also disappointed that Mimi didn’t run ’em till they puked before convening Book Club, but if it leads to Molly and Nancy giving Linda a TCFS button for skipping volleyball practice to eat a hash brownie at the Coffee Cantina, I can live with it.

Oh Lord. Kumbaya.

Back at it after 2 weeks off and .. are we Still on the ‘Reasons Why Individuals Couldnt Make a Meaningless Scrimmage That Is Tearing The Team Apart’..?

This strip has been a lot like the Cubs season so far, of which I witnessed the opening series in Texas.  They were completely dominant in the opener, so much so that almost everyone was predicting a sweep; writers, fans of both sides, even the mascot. And it has gone extremely downhill since then, a plethora of Ranger home runs and assorted extra base hits leading to a series win for the home side, (who knew the Cub bullpen would turn into the Nationals’?) and continuing in Atlanta and Milwaukee with even more horrid baseball;  the day after I got home they played perhaps their worst game in my lifetime, committing 6 errors while also getting shut out, which hadnt happened since the summer of ’65, pre-Rob.  (The Rennie Stennett 7-for-7 22-0 Pirate drubbing in 1975 would be the runner-up).

Hey, theyre giving up more runs then the Bears gave up points last season, or it seems like it.

Well we always start off with a promising new storyline every season (wow we have a girls story!), and then it quickly turns into a suckfest, and here we go again with the endless whining by all the girls (3 more panels of this??) about why they couldnt play in a scrimmage that we never saw, and over analysis of the various girls other lives outside of softball, until a month goes by and we havent played a game yet. P2 has a player with an exclamation point on her jersey, bringing to mind the Riddler in Batman with his question mark

And finally the dopey male in the story falls for Mollys assertion that they all sang Kumbaya. At least someone looks dumb besides Rubin/Whigham.

Flogging Molly

Meow!

Pretty damned presumptuous of  Linda to assume Molly’s skating event didn’t involve her family.  Most young people I’ve known who have been involved with events on ice have had massive family support, not only in dollars but in time (predawn drives to rinks for ice time come to mind).  Also presumptuous of Linda to think her volleyball extracurriculars are somehow more worthy than Molly’s synchronized skating.  Guess that’s what happens when your high school only offers football, basketball, baseball/softball, soccer and track (the latter two we almost never see or hear about because no one named Thorp coaches them).

People who shed in their lockers shouldn’t throw stones, nah mean?  Now Steve Luhm’s gonna have to show up and sweep all that hair off the locker room floor.  More likely, we’re gonna be treated to a couple of days of Molly’s “nobody understands me or my skating hobby” pity party.  That, or Mimi signing up all the Lady Mudlarks for skating lessons so that they can become as graceful as Molly in the field.

 

 

Bad Moon Rising

When I was in college I was talking to one of my dormmates about Harry Caray and Steve Stone of the Cubs broadcasts. He said he was watching a game where Harry made some off-hand remark during what Stone thought was a commercial break and Stone said -” Harry, you’re full of shit.”  not knowing they were still on the air.  My friend embellished it by paraphrasing Stone immediately saying – “..   Oops we’re on the air!! ”

I guess dopey Robby Howry is too dense to figure out that in a freakin’ radio studio he MAY be on the air with his remarks. Hey, I’m sure all of them are true and needed to be said one of these days but leave it to ol’ Marty to put Howry down a peg, and re-establish himself as the WDIG front-runner for top radio DJ. I have no idea what the bonus is, and will leave it to the commentors to figure that out.

metapost: teenchy here, dropping the March 1 panel on top of Rob’s March 2. Consider this a twofer. Never let it be said that Marty Moon can’t learn: having had his Lonesome Rhodes moment at the hands of the Milford Pirate Network, he hands B/Robby one of his own.

 

Sad eyes – turn the other way..

hey gang – I’m back from a weekend in Muskegon where I went luging for the first time- – my fastest run was 21.3 seconds, about 2 seconds slower then the bronze medalist (the gold and silver went to kids, who probably live nearby and can get more practice) and the weather was ideal; about 11 degrees while we were luging in the evening, and we got 6 inches of snow all weekend so the winter sports activities were in full swing. It was a ton of fun and I’ll be back next year to bring home a medal! Thanks again to Ed for filling in for me last Friday.

Well it seems the cop that found these guys preparing to graffiti Bobbys’ sign is pro-Bobby, otherwise why the hell would he permit a sign like that in the first place?? How dare he take down a sign that says Fire Gil Thorp.?  How does one get permission to put up something like that anyway? I think the guy thats luckier then smart is Bobby. All these kids are doing is righting a wrong, to them anyway, (I know that if Thorp got shot out of a cannon to the moon tomorrow there’d be much cheering in Mudville)  but how on earth would law enforcement allow such a sign about a guy who stands for Milford more then Bozo stands for the Circus? ( Hey thats a great analogy!)

So when Gil finds out about this maybe he’ll sneak out at night and try to cover it himself. I recall him sneaking around a golf course at night some years back and Chief Lind finding him trespassing. Of course it was covered up.

 

How about the Peace Train?

Wow its Monday already! Finally we have time moving. Just in time for time to move backward– dont forget to change your clocks this Saturday night–  1 hour back, except if you live in Arizona or parts of Indiana, then ignore this announcement.  Its so Milford to go forward when everyone else is going backward, but I digress…

The subway?? The bullet train?? Where does that one go– only to Goshen and back? My first car was silver and my uncle said – ‘what do you call it, the Silver Bullet? ‘Not bad, but I chose the Rob Royce.

And how does your car conveniently die right near these 2 options anyway? And biking would require having your bike in your car. You hear me Gil?? A unicycle is used mostly at the circus, and requires a bit of training and balance. And storage in ones car..

 

 

 

 

It’s Not Just The Win That’s Moot

Marty had a point

Season is already lost

So bench best player

 

Even if he starts

An impromptu striptease in

Front of the coaches

 

Gil’s a defeatist

Many teams make the postseason

With losing records

 

So can we assume

There are less than two games left?

Please let it be so

 

Making kids examples

To show that Gil has standards

It’s the Milford way

 

Until he finds out

Tiki has legit reasons

Then he must save face

 

He’ll give Marty

Some lame-assed excuse about

Special teams lapses

 

If he’d spent more time

On the offense, they would face

Fewer fourth downs

 

What happened to Joe

And Kaz’s fancy software?

Bolek could have helped

 

Or was he busy

Hanging the uniforms so

Neatly in lockers?