This Week in Milford

September 30, 2016

What the hell is goin on here?

Really?? What the hell is Gil smoking that he’s gonna waste practice time teaching a new QB from scratch NOW??? In week 2? Handoffs?? When theyve had all freakin summer to do this? Why didnt Palweki let Gil know of his intentions when he was making footprints on the beach? And by the looks of things it’ll be 2018 before he completes a pass. And thats practicing every day. What about taking the snap?? Learning the plays inside out including the line assignments?? Commanding the huddle? Reading defenses?? Audibles?? I could go on and on but steam comes out of my ears.

Unless Gil wants to just show him how hard it is, so he’ll forget about it after a few days. Otherwise this is pure lunacy. At its finest. Comment away!

September 29, 2016

Beef on (Pel)weck(i)


I don’t recall seeing the panel where The Secret Pelwecki told Gil he owed him a shot at QB just because he caused the fumble that gave the Mudlarks a shot to win the Oakwood game. I’m not gonna even try to come up with an analogy for that logic.

If Gil only knew that the new assistant trainer fancies herself The Quarterback Whisperer. He could let her work her magic on Kevin and help him realize his potential to come up big when it’s least expected. Gil needs to realize that his team’s winning the state championship two seasons ago rested entirely on the fluke of Art Standish finding a job in the Valley and Art’s son feeling most comfortable under Gil’s laissez-faire guidance. Maybe the fluke (or is that flake?) that is Pelwecki can lead his team back to the playdowns.

Speaking of flukes, as I write Wake Forest is 4-0!

metapost: I’m going to be traveling on Saturday morning and would be grateful if one of my fellow bloggers could step in for me. If not, it’ll be late in the day before I get a chance to post. Okay? Okay!

September 28, 2016

He’s Asking, Well, He’s Asking What We’re All Asking…

Filed under: Coach Kaz, freak hands, Gil Thorp, Milford Idiots, Pantheon of Hair — timbuys @ 7:35 am


I’m trying to get a read on the emotions going through Dory’s mind as he dialogues with The Secret Pelwecki. It seems like a mix of incredulity and contempt with a very strong overtone of panic as he realizes that he’s sitting next to the latest Milfordian boy to succumb to delusions of tank town grandeur.

I was so taken by following The Sec-Pel’s train of thought, that I almost didn’t notice that he was making this pitch to Gil and Kaz in panel two. Gil looks like he’s about to fall over backwards drunk while Kaz is reminiscing about his bouncer days as he flexes intimidatingly in an attempt to shoo Kevin away.

Meanwhile, in panel three… Uh, hey, let’s all just pretend panel three didn’t happen.


September 16, 2016

Don’t laugh, but I really want to try out for Journey.

Oh yes Kevin Pelwecki, I’m laughing. First because you skipped your summer haircut, (not that you guys had a summer anyway), second because of your hair-brained (pun) idea to try playing a position thats usually determined by who’s playing it on the sophomore team, whos had at least a season of actual QB play under his belt at the lower levels, not to mention a summer practicing 7 on 7’s, (again we have that summer problem). How many varsity programs have a guard/linebacker just walk into practice in mid-September  and throw em under center? We go thru this goofy stuff every year, whether its golfing under par in a month or playing basketball after playing rugby all their life. Do all the idiots live in Milford?  Good God almighty he needs to learn the playbook upside down, in a week! We have 3 months of this dope now? I know – send him to the soccer field to replace Heather. Nobody’d know the difference with that long ‘do. He could take the stage and pass for Steve Perry too if so inclined. Til he opens his mouth of course.

Cue up the Monkees:

September 15, 2016

I Felt Like Skipping, Too, But I Posted This Anyway

Filed under: bizarre cameos, football, freak hands, Gil Thorp, Milford Idiots, soccer — teenchy @ 4:29 am


Say goodbye to the brutally honest Coach Dawes. Nice knowin’ ya.

Back to the gridiron where three unidentifiable lumps* converse. Maybe the lump in shoulder pads and shorts is our newfound Friend of TWIM Kevin Pelwecki, based on his size and dark mullet. Not sure what the other two are supposed to be laughing or not laughing about but it might be that already marked 40-yard line, which is put down 90 degrees off from any I’ve ever seen.  When Gil needs help getting the chalk down on the field, you know it’s gonna be a long season – figuratively, that is; I don’t see this one lasting five and a half months in real time myself.

* TWIMer Max points out that unidentifiable lump nearest the reader is one-armed Coach Steve Boone. Perhaps I should not have assumed that he could have had an arm obscured in shadow.

September 6, 2016

Hey, Football! And Another Obnoxious Milford Teenager..

Filed under: football, metapost, Milford Idiots — timbuys @ 7:18 am


So, to be sure we’re all clear here, Kevin Pelwecki appears to read and, at least twice, comment on this blog.  Things are getting meta here and I’ve neither the time nor inclination to ponder the implications of it all. Hopefully, this is not some sort of Peter Thiel style subversion where we end up libeling Kevin and the vast TWIM empire dissipates in a cloud of smoke as Whigrub reaps their terrible revenge for all of our snarking over the years.

Back to the strip: Huh, another over ambitious and therefore socially awkward boy happens upon the scene. Sure, why not?

September 3, 2016

Six Months in a Leaky Plot


I wrote the title of this post thinking I had another song parody in me, but truly this arc isn’t worthy of another. Still I think it sums up what a lot of us have thought about this shipwreck.

A week or so ago some friends and I were discussing the first black player for the Washington Senators, Carlos Paula.  Paula was a good-hit, no-field outfielder who was painted with an awful lot of stereotypes in 1950s Washington. In a way, the spring/summer Gil Thorp story arc has reminded me of Paula: good artwork, poor storytelling, and painted with an awful lot of stereotypes.

Are any of you as gobsmacked as I am about Jerry Lewis’ Barry’s desire to install a littlefreelibrary in his front yard? Does he really believe this will serve as his own version of a Boo Radley Memorial, not realizing that it will only serve as a constant reminder to his mother of the incident that killed an innocent* girl and took her husband away for eight to twelve years? Of course, maybe the For Sale sign will be going up on Schloss Bader next week, making the question moot. Maybe this is meant to cement in the readers’ minds that Barry learned absolutely nothing over the last six months in real time, and that any speculation that his clueless braggadocio was some kind of a coping mechanism  was just that – speculation.

What was the lesson here? Did anyone really learn anything? I’d venture that the only lesson learned was by Del: “Don’t drink and drive, but if you do and you get caught, it pays to shop around for a defense attorney.”

Hopefully this is the last we see of Truman (True) Standish, who went from being the star quarterback who led Milford to its first state football championship to the sun around which everything and everybody in the Milford universe revolves.  As pointed out in yesterday’s comments, Wake Forest didn’t exactly light up the scoreboard against Tulane Thursday night, so there’s a good chance he can crack the starting lineup before season’s end. If he continues down the path Rubin created for him, he’ll probably get HB2 overturned, the voting districts ungerrymandered, and end the debate over Eastern-style and Lexington-style barbecue.

I wish I had more to say today; I’ve certainly had plenty of time to mull it over. Maybe it’s time for one of my fellow bloggers to take over the Saturday spot, as they may be better closers than I. I should still get coffee, though.

Anyway, enjoy this clip of the inspiration for today’s post title. Hope to see y’all on the gridiron on Monday.

*Even more innocent when the talking on a phone while driving panel was edited out in some media.

September 1, 2016

At Least It’s Not Called “Boo’s Legacy”

Filed under: Chunky Bracelets, Gil Thorp, Just plain sad, Marjie Ducey, Milford Idiots — teenchy @ 5:02 am


Was this entire plot a setup to plug At least that’s a real thing, although it might be more impressive if Whigrub had been able to create a real thing based on one of their fictional characters. I’m still eyerolling on the idea that naming a character after a famous literary one and giving her one panel in which she suggests someone read a book turns her into a book lover. Retcon away, Rubin!

Seen but not heard: Boo’s mom a/k/a Mrs. Radley (guess she kept her married name after the divorce), who was only first referred to this past Saturday.

Neither heard nor seen: Boo’s dad a/k/a Mr. Radley, who has been completely absent throughout this arc. Wonder how he felt about all of this, having caved last year and bought Boo that Jeep Compass in which she met her demise?

Also neither heard nor seen: Marjie Ducey, whose tag I’ve added since True is responding to her implied question, “Did you invent the idea, True?”


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