All Hands On Rick!

In the forest of hands found in today’s strip Rick Scott’s speaks the loudest, as it tells pissy Uncle Gary to talk to it. We could have fun all day coming up with witty retorts to Uncle Gary’s question but I think Rick does well enough making the point that he needs to stfu when grown folks is talkin’.

Meanwhile I dunno what Connie Soto’s doing with hers: checking out the results of her facial/wax job, maybe. She’s managed to pop her ear out from under her hairdo, giving her that Middle Earth look that pops up in Milford from time to time.

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Worst Maternal Instinct Ever

Alternate title to today’s post: Milford! Drive Away From Here And Never Come Back!

We give Rubin a lot of well deserved grief for poor plot construction and characterization, but I think Connie (is that her name? Can’t be bothered to look it up…) Soto takes the cake. It’s amazing, we know more about Rick’s dad’s story and he’s been in Dubai this whole time!

Bonus Question: Is Uncle Gary wearing the jacket I think he’s wearing?

That’s Using Your Head! Or, The Other Guy.

Ugh. Well, here we are.

Uncle Gary should actually be quite satisfied with this outcome. Little Ricky’s golden throat appears uninjured (a blow to the larynx would delay if not derail his future crooning career at the Central City Copacabana) and, even if Ricky drops a few points off the ol’ IQ metric, it’s not exactly like singers are paid to think.

Tune in tomorrow to see if we get to find out what happened to the other guy.

Nice to Know Somebody Likes Something About All of This

There’s an underlying aura of creepiness that I can’t exactly put my finger on about today’s strip. Is it Trainer Rick Scott’s “I like what I see here” as he lovingly cradles Rick’s bare foot and calf? Is it that Uncle Gary (and his enormously oversized Bluetooth earbud) has a posse of the equally underemployed to roll out YouTube videos at his command? Is it Rick waving his arm like Evita Peron* as he sings the national anthem? Or is it the idea of rando Milfordian’s grandpa’s browser history that led him to Rick’s performance?

*It doesn’t take much to imagine Rick singing “Don’t cry for me, Milford High School…”

metapost: Weird double post this morning. Hopefully I fixed it.

Just when you thought it was safe….

….to miss Rick singing at a game, here it comes. But first we have to look at his foot with a pumpkin on top of it. Oh yeah, that supposed to be an icebag. Last time I was that close to a foot I walked into the tiny  pro shop at a golf course and the female employee was standing on a chair barefoot dusting the ceiling fan. I told her I almost ran into her feet, and resisted a sudden urge to tickle them. Lol. If I ever write about my golf career this story would definitely make the list. Life has those unique moments you always remember.

P2 – really, how many trainers at a high school have pictures of leg bones on their wall? This isnt a doctors office for chrissake. And the diagrams have boxes pointing to them containing 4 straight lines, which are supposed to be words but shit they dont even look close to it. And no way is anyones kneecap THAT big compared to their leg bones. Jeez. F for artwork today.

And in P3 we have Uncle Dickwad on his PC lining up Ricks singing gig in front of millions of YouTube fans. I have a feeling now its not before a game, but somewhere else. Hey, as long as its not on this strip I’m fine with it.

Looks Like Your Classic Inane Plot Twist.

Taken out of the context of the ostensible plot of the fall arc, today’s strip could actually be pretty great. As it is, well, let’s just say I’m not especially enthusiastic to see how Uncle Gary ends up spinning this development, to say nothing of whether this has any implications for Kevin’s future at FB. Also, concussions. Or something.

And the plotline wheel spins round and round

Yeah I got plenty of playing time Friday – been out in the dark almost every day with the sun going down and a truckload of parcels. But back to the story. Trainer Rick leaked Heathers non-injury to Gil, and he will now punish her for this malfeasance by throwing her to the wolves, or whoever theyre playing Friday. Is he teaching her a lesson in integrity or just telling her – if you cant be one of the regular players, then you cant be on the team. No more special treatment Missy.

Rick Scott Don’t Need This Crap

Looks like HE the TE is still several steps ahead of the Milford coaching staff and she’s taking it upon herself to exit the game. That’s just swell.

Panel 1 has one of those M.C. Escher like illusions where Trainer Rick Scott is next to Heather from the waist up but behind her from the waist down. In Panel 2, Trainer Rick Scott is at his Jean Luc Picard-iest. Dr. Pearl, here’s my completed retirement packet. Make it so!

Happy Thanksgiving everybody. Stay safe.