This Week in Milford

September 19, 2015

A Dear in the Footlights

Filed under: Marty Moon, Milford Idiots, What the hell is going on here? — teenchy @ 1:30 pm


Maybe you all are right: maybe this is Tricky Dick Travolta, or at the very least a guy who’s dressing up as Vincent Vega for Jack Rabbit Slim’s night at Schultz’s Polynesian. Don’t ask me why Keith Hernandez has taken a gig as his lighting technician, though. I thought he had a pennant race to cover.

Meanwhile Marty’s pulled out all the stops to play Holly’s publicist: he pulled his old Erector set out of storage and hooked it up to hold empty liquor bottles covered in pipe insulation. Holly flashes a little cleavage to lead Marty down the rabbit hole and hints she’s done similar to the Milford school superintendent. For this whole reality show troupe to materialize out of nowhere in the halls of Milford High without anyone on the faculty being aware of it requires some suspension of disbelief. Of course it’s only Gil and Kaz who so far seem clueless about it, so why should today be any different?



  1. The last detail Dear Superintendent had to work out was probably: where will I disappear to when the community finds out that I signed us up to host the re-boot of “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo”? It was the spring of 2009 when the Milford HS principal saw a photo of Molly Kinsella in a cardboard box bikini, and she went all Roger Goodell on everyone involved. She’s not going to be any happier about this.
    The next thing that makes no sense is: if they’re really doing a reality show, they would not have missed taping the reunion of Holly and Marty. We have to expect that she’s going to lead him on for a while, and then pull the rug out from under him and stomp on his heart like it’s a spider she saw in her shower. They can’t afford to let the drama start without recording it.

    Comment by Philip — September 19, 2015 @ 2:58 pm

  2. Holly + Marty = holmart

    I am so bored and confused as to how these multiple story lines are going to work (Twue as QB, Twue’s college commitment, Milford chases state championship, offensive line/Steve issues, offensive line brothers, Jarroo story, Marty and Holly, reality TV series, etc.) that there is really nothing to say.

    At least we don’t have the added confusion of actual games to worry about.

    Comment by Milfordian — September 19, 2015 @ 3:12 pm

  3. At least we don’t have the added confusion of actual games to worry about.

    Yes, given that most high schools have already played four games this season, you have to wonder when Milford’s opener will be. Where’s our backyard tire fire annual bonfire before the first football game?

    Comment by Moon Mullins — September 19, 2015 @ 4:44 pm

  4. I really hope that the reality show is along the lines of a Milford Hard Knocks. That would just be amazing, moreso than any actual plot that goes on in this strip. And yeah, when’s the annual ritual sacrifice bonfire, anyway?

    Comment by emptyeye — September 19, 2015 @ 6:14 pm

  5. Panel 1 is not Keith Hernandez, rather it’s the disco referee…

    Comment by Rowdyman — September 19, 2015 @ 6:50 pm

  6. Yes, Steve the Disco Referee.

    I for one cannot WAIT for the pep bonfire. Shadow people, hovering spacecraft, the works. And with Holly Wood there to exploit the entire thing, we Will Have Controversy, and Marty Moon making an ass of himself as he has hardly done within living memory.

    Comment by vaganova — September 19, 2015 @ 9:37 pm

  7. And still no sign of Bob Roth…

    Comment by John S. Walters — September 19, 2015 @ 10:29 pm

  8. Come to think of it, isn’t this whole premise wildly in violation of federal privacy law for students?

    Comment by John S. Walters — September 19, 2015 @ 10:31 pm

  9. John, I’m not an attorney, so take this with a grain of salt. The big federal privacy law appears to be FERPA, aka the Buckley Amendment. If the reality show cameras revealed that Breck Darwin got an 82 on his chemistry midterm, that would be a clear violation. The small minority of school districts that might approve this foolish project would certainly have all the parents sign waivers. Lots and lots of waivers. They’d probably have at least one team of lawyers review footage to exclude anything that might remotely attract Washington’s attention. The only time I can recall this kind of thing actually being done was MTV’s “Two A Days” about ten years ago. I don’t know how that school managed parent’s objections.

    Comment by Philip — September 20, 2015 @ 6:40 am

  10. John S and Philip are beyond “on target.” School superintendents and their employers, school boards, are probably the most risk-averse group on the planet, and for them to expose individual minors to ongoing national scrutiny, especially with something as asinine and potentially inflammatory as a “reality” show, is unimaginable. Even when the Daily Bugle interviews a kid about his science project, there is a senior school official present with veto power over what is to be published.

    But this is Mfnrd, where the bylaws are automatically suspended in order to keep us coming back to see what train wreck Holly Wood’s return will produce. For now, I would settle for a strip showing Dr Pearl– ordered by the superintendent to cooperate with these morons– downing vodka shots in preparation.

    Comment by vaganova — September 20, 2015 @ 1:22 pm

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